I’m So Lame

Alright, when did friends become necessary?

I’m twenty-two years old. Half of my friends decided to hit the road for the big city when they threw their graduation caps into the air. The other half, well, they have either moved or become mothers.

Tonight, I went out to dinner with my in-laws to a pretty “hip” restaurant/bar and I watched as all the people my age threw back the Jager Bombs and Buds. And I was sitting … at a table with my husband, my sister in law, my father in law, and my one and a half year old nephew. I have to say that many times throughout the dinner, I heavily sighed and wondered if I was missing out on my youth by sitting in the non-smoking section, silently yelling at the fun people to shut up so I can enjoy my fifty cent boneless teriyaki wings.

I can’t really say when I lost my youth, which most of the people that read this will laugh at me, but I feel as though I am sixty years old, knitting on Friday nights with my cup of herbal tea, and re-runs of Murder She Wrote playing on the television. But I guess with the big life changes I have encountered, it’s only natural reaction to become more mature, but I feel like I lost my zest for the wild and dangerous and it’s completely boring.

I feel this is mostly due to the fact that I have no friends my age. Everyone I associate with is at least ten years older than I am. My best friend from high school moved over a year ago to Wisconsin, leaving me to party on my own and now she is just as responsible as I am, worried about paying bills and being all fru-fru with her fiancée. HOW FREAKING LAME. Two years ago, I worked at an ice cream store, where I was the oldest person who worked there and it was great. I loved hanging out with the cute little fifteen and sixteen year olds. Laughing when they asked if I could pick them up some illegal alcohol from my older friends. But when the store failed, so did all the friendship. When the doors closed, so did my social life.

I guess I am just whining about how much it sucks to be so young and without a best friend. Who do I call when I fight with my husband? No one. Who do I call when I get a raise at work? My mom. Who do I call when I want to go out? My sister. Where are all the cool people hiding? Why won’t they come hang out with me?
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06.25.2009
Jayne Martin
First of all, I AM 60 and I'm still totally cool. The easiest way to make friends is through an activity or hobby that you really feel passionate about. There must be something you like to do. Some class you'd like to take. You seem to like to write. Most junior colleges have evening writing courses. Do that. I have a passion for horses and most of my best friends throughout the years have come from that. I've also made life-long friends through various jobs I've had and various organizations that I've volunteered my time for. There are non-profit groups everywhere would be over-the-moon happy to have your help. If, at 22, you can't find any friends, you're just not trying. They're everywhere. Good luck.
I know how you feel...there are so many nights that my boyfriend and I go to bed at 10 p.m., and we think, "When did we get so old?" It can be hard to find friends, but don't give up!
02.20.2009
francesh
I can't tell you how much I can relate to your post. It's so much easier said than done when it comes to finding friends!
02.06.2009
Tiffany Heuser
First things first. "Where are all the cool people hiding? Why won’t they come hang out with me?" That might have have something to do with it. Chin up, girlie girl! Friends aren't super-hard to come by, but people aren't just going to magically appear and be your friend. Do you have a job? Make friends there. Do you go to college? You can meet people in your classes. Try meetup.com (but be careful!) and you can fine people in your city who like the same things you like. "Cool" doesn't mean a lot anyway. Don't look for people who are hip, look for people who you can relate too. Put yourself out there, you know?
It feels good to write.

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