And you thought the pre-date anxiety was the hardest part? Think again. Any serial dater knows the most infuriating time in the early stages of a relationship is the twenty-four to forty-eight hours that follow the first date.
When’s he going to call? Should you call him? What’s an appropriate amount of time to wait? Here are some guidelines to keep in mind:
Sleep on it.
Give yourself some time to assess your feelings and the date itself.
Don’t be afraid to call him.
Haven’t heard from him yet? Give him a call. A lot of women are afraid to take the initiative on this one, for fear of seeming desperate or over eager. But that’s just silly and outdated. A lot of men will respect you for having the guts to follow up. If this guy doesn’t, he’s probably not worth your time anyway.
But, don’t call if you have nothing to say.
Know of a show you’d like to invite him to? Give him a call. Or maybe you saw something that reminded you of a conversation you had. By all means, tell him about it. But if you’re calling just to sit awkwardly on the other end of the phone, waiting for him to say something meaningful, you’re wasting both of your time.
Know when to back off.
If you find that you’re the only one making any sincere effort after the first, second, or third date, it may be time to cut your losses and move on. Don’t project your own feelings of interest onto him or you might just find you’re having a relationship with yourself. Let him reach out to you. If he doesn’t, onwards and upwards! Life is too short and you’re too awesome to be making all the effort.
And what if you don’t like him? How do you break the news?
Be kind.
Think about how you’d want to be treated if you were the rejectee. Nothing is worse than being left in the dark. If your date expresses interest in pursuing the relationship, a phone call or email will go a long way towards giving the both of you piece of mind.
