I was in a quasi-relationship a few months ago and my beau broke up with me via email and then followed up with a phone call. I thought it was a very cowardly yet business professional. I took it in stride. His initial email stated, “We need to talk. The healthiest thing for me to do is just be straight up with you.”
It was the kiss of death email. I knew it was going to be bad when he advised that we needed to talk. I responded within twenty-four hours advising him to call me when he gets a chance. I used a one liner. I am not one for questions, so I was sweet and to the point. Plus, I could sense a drastic change in his behavior. He wasn’t returning my calls and I saw his car at his ex-girlfriend’s house. Forgive me; I haven’t done a drive by since the ’90s. But, if you do one, make sure you use a friend’s car and it is late at night.
Moving on, he eventually called and we had “the talk.” He was going back to his ex. Who coincidentally called within exactly thirty minutes of our break-up conversation. It was obviously timed which made it all the more cowardly and circa 1996.
Initially, I considered him a weak man until I heard the story about Nikki McPhatter. She is a woman from Charlotte, North Carolina who recently was shot in the head and burned in her car. Nikki is a friend of my close friend which made it really hit home for me. Nikki was missing for a couple of weeks and they found her remains in her burned up car.
The saddest part of the story is that she was going to break up with her boyfriend who consequently murdered her. Apparently he didn’t take the break up well and took her life. She was only thirty years old. Her experience laid a major impact of caution over me and many women who followed the story. Breaking up can be deadly.
Therefore, I shouldn’t be mad at my ex-beau for breaking up with me via email. Not in this day and time. People are crazy and have different sensitive breaking points. People are upset about the recession. They haven’t gotten over passed mental abuse. People are on drugs. People are beautiful but make bad decisions.
In retrospect, I congratulate my ex-beau for breaking up with me via email. I think it is a mark of using technology not only for business but for relationship safety. So, be careful with beginning and ending all love endeavors.
