I remember, just after my divorce, many caring friends tried to set me up on blind dates. It was always “I know this great guy who you would love!” or “This man is perfect for you!” What they are really saying is they know someone who can’t get a date, or relationship-challenged. Run and hide!
Haha, ok, blind dates are not always so horrendous. But I remember one in particular that made me want to swear off dating for good. I was being picked up for dinner and drinks by a guy; we’ll call him “Wayne.” Well, Wayne was almost a half-hour late picking me up at my apartment; I was almost ready to lock the door, kick off my shoes and open the Ben & Jerry’s, you know?
Well, he finally shows up and mumbles an excuse; he is quite obviously nervous but seems nice enough. We hop into his rather large pickup truck and start pulling out of my parking lot. That’s when I stopped him.
“I forgot my wallet, can we turn around? I’ll just be a minute.” I smiled politely. He then tells me, “Oh, don’t worry about it, I can pay for the date ... and you can simply pay me back later.”
Are you kidding me??
“No really, it’s quite all right; it will just take a second if you don’t mind.” Saying this through my teeth, trying to keep smiling. He swears it’s all right, “just this once.” So we drive down to a pub. I was not ... let me repeat, NOT happy about this. So we arrive and tells me to order anything I want, his treat, and follows that up with “Just keep it cheap and don’t worry, you can pay me back on our next date.” Any thoughts that he was joking were thrown out the window at this point.
So I proceeded to order their top-shelf martini. And didn’t like it, so I ordered their finest scotch on the rocks. Strangly that wasn’t suiting me fancy either. So I ordered a Mai Tai, then a top-shelf Whisky Sour, then their finest Margarita. All on his tab, of course, none of which I finished. I ordered an appetizer, a filet dinner, dessert, and an Irish Coffee. Then I asked if I could take some money on his tab for the restroom attendant; he agreed, so I asked for a $20. I grabbed my purse and excused myself.
And proceeded the leave the pub and take a cab home. Cold-hearted? Probably, but maybe he will learn how not to make a first impression. Needless to say, he never called me for a second date, haha.
