As insane as it may sound, I just finished watching The Notebook. Ok, so I am a little behind on my movies!
This movie exceeded all expectations I had for it. It certainly was deeper than most movies and surpassed your typical storyline. It brought my significant other and I to my mind. The years, the fights, the letting go of each other, and finding one another again…..all of the memories of the past years and the hopes for the future flooded my mind.
I didn’t grow up dreaming of the perfect husband, a perfect white picket fence, or perfect children running in the back yard. Somehow, I skipped over this stage rather than daydream like my peers. I wanted to make something of myself. I wanted to be independent and take care of myself without the help of a man.
When Barry and I met, I certainly wasn’t looking for “Mr. Right.” Most guessed our relationship would be short-lived, more than likely due to the fact Barry is quite a bit older than me, with children. But from the beginning, there was something there. I wouldn’t say love at first sight, as I don’t believe in that. But the closest thing possible to love was present.
Like Allie and Noah from The Notebook, we spent lots of time together, fought a lot, and even broke up a few times. No matter what the situation, though, we always ended back in each other’s arms. Anything I faced, good or bad, I always had the urge to run to him first. I think it shocked us both that two people with very different backgrounds, such a huge age difference, and different personalities could be as in love as we were. It was almost unfair that we weren’t born the same age so that things could be easier for us and for our relationship.
They say if you love something, let it go, if it comes back to you, then it’s yours. If not, then it was never meant to be. Barry has known since the first day he ever spoke to me, that this was one of my favorite quotes.
Even after quite some time, this man made my heart flutter when he walked in the room. (It still does!) I loved doing things for him, anything that could make his daily life easier. Marriage had been discussed a couple of times yet we were still held back by What If’s, mainly due to the age difference. One day I told him: None of us are promised tomorrow. Either of us could be taken any moment. Wouldn’t you rather be happy the next 10 years rather than look back and wonder “what if?” There were no doubts we loved one another. We could see it in the others eyes, feel it in our touch, and hear it in our voices.
During our 4.5 years of dating, Barry and I broke up twice. I knew in my heart, if it was truly meant to be, he would come back to me and I would come back to him. I had to keep faith that if I never saw Barry again, it was God’s will. This was not something I wanted to accept deep down. I tried really hard to get over him and I know he did the same. I will be honest when I say, I tried to hate him but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t. I knew he was the one for me, but I was scared I had lost him forever.
A few months ago, circumstances, which I like to say are acts from God, occurred and Barry and I were brought back together. Forever this time. The love we have for one another has only grown stronger and I truly couldn’t imagine going any further in my life without him.
