I’m learning to cope with the not-so-great life of having different work schedules. I work days and my boyfriend works nights. Therefore, we both have learned to participate in activities without one another. This kind of thing would have been bothersome a year ago and hard for me to deal with but for 2009 I have decided to stop being so analytical. This has worked for us so far, making our relationship stronger. We no longer have unnecessary arguments.
I’ve also started taking time out to do small gestures that aren’t over the top but mean a lot to him. For instance, he works in construction boots all night and he loves for me to give him a pedicure because he thinks his feet are too ugly to have them done professionally. But it also relaxes him and makes him feel a little more secure about his feet. I also try to make him breakfast in bed on Saturday and run his shower water for him so it won’t be cold when he gets in. These are small things that accommodate his needs but go a long way in the end. In return, he has started going grocery shopping with me and doing our laundry. He also, on some days, has dinner prepared by the time I get home from work. One of my biggest complaints before was him not listening to what I had to say. So when I had something important to say I would write him a letter and leave it for him and stick it in his lunch box. I guess he realized if I took the time to write it down then maybe what I had to say wasn’t just for me to be hearing myself speak, but was worth an ear. We are both still growing and learning but our efforts toward “us” are bringing great benefits.
