Do You Ever Stop Being a Single Mom?

You might have heard the recent news about this one single mom we greatly admire: Kristin, the single mom blogger at Work It Mom who also has a huge following at her own blog, Better Now. 

Well, Kristin has just announced that she stepping down from her columnist position. Why? Because she’s hinted that she’s moving in with her super helpful boyfriend: “ … our living arrangements are going to be shifting. And no, I don’t think it’s too soon. When you know, you know. It’s ridiculous and clichéd and totally true.” 

And, as she adds: “It’s hard to write a column about single parenting when you’re not single.” 

So, we’d love to know: Does your “single mom” identity change after you’re in committed relationship? 

When Rachel posted about the number of single parent bloggers who have fallen in love, your responses about this topic fascinated us. 

Alicia nailed it: “Singlemommyhood is not a permanent identity marker. It is a fluid state, as we, as people, move in and out of relationships and seek our true selves. We’re all social creatures, just doing what we do … No one can deny the power of love.” 

Still, what if you’re a single mom who moves in with your boyfriend? Or, you start splitting finances? Does this change your identity at all? 

Or, maybe it’s not appropriate to call yourself a “single mom” after you get married? 

Another single mom, Martini Mom, tells us about her boyfriend moving in recently. 

“So I’m clearly no longer a single person,” she says. “But single mom? That’s trickier … True, I’m no longer doing it all by myself. There is someone to help with the dishes while I’m getting the kid to bed, for example. BUT a large part of the single parent thing (at least in my situation) is the challenge of co-parenting with an ex. That doesn’t go away just because I’m no longer single.” 

So, what’s true for you? 

Will a part of your identity forever remain “single mom” no matter where love may lead you? 

Originally published on SingleMommyhood

3 readers liked this story.
From Around the Web:
07.10.2011
Ashley Wallace
It's hard to be not a single parent. guess it depends on how long you've been a single parent. My daughter is going to be 9 this summer. broke up with her father actually b4 i knew i was pregnant with her and he's been mostly out of her life. Now this summer we are getting married. Not to her biological father but to a wonderful guy that totally adores us both! I have just recently stopped saying that i am a single mom. we aren't living all together yet but he's there. He isn't just there he helps with her, watching her, discipline, playing, teaching. I'm now comfortable saying I AM NO LONGER A SINGLE MOM!!!! :)
I don't know how this caught my eye but im glad it did. I get married in 2 weeks. My fiancé is, was a single mom. I love our daughter. I will do anything for her, because accepting my fiancé means accepting our Daughter ( that happens to be amazing ). Now, that being said it wasn't always like that. I think for guys it's more of a comfort zone issue, especially if they don't have kids of their own. Initially they are attracted to you that why we started our "pursuit" and if you're not out with your kids, it's no way the guy is going to know that, unless, he has super powers ( some of us do but very unlikely ). Anyways, got to give the boyfriend a break, it's a whole new world for him, you got to break him in. Attack the comfort zone until we break and go to dance recitals, until we babysit while you're at work, etc, it works. When you have someone that loves you for you and takes everything and loves everything about you. You will be a single mom no more. http://tinyurl.com/6b6u8nt
It feels good to write.

Your stories, musings, and advice are welcome here. We know you've got something to share, so jump in!

Article_sweeps
Most Liked Stories
Loader_buff
Sweeps_offers_article_300_top
Win a $10,000 escape to Jamaica! Enter as often as you wish.
Win a $10,000 escape to Jamaica! Enter as often as you wish.
VIEW ALL