Dear Sugar,
I have been dating someone for almost two months now, and I’m really starting to fall for him. He had a profile on an online dating Web site, but that wasn’t how we met—he was someone from my past who reappeared on his own. In the almost two months we have been together, I have checked his profile and noticed that he has been on the Web site numerous times. I can’t help but have hurt feelings that he hasn’t closed his account. I just feel like if he were really into me, he would have changed his profile from single to in a relationship. Should I ask him to? Is he looking for other women? Are we on two different pages? I’m just so confused by this.—I’m Hurt Helen
Dear I’m Hurt Helen,
I don’t blame you for having hurt feelings by the fact that your boyfriend still claims to be single, which is why I advise you to broach the subject with him ASAP. It’s easy to jump to conclusions here, but try not to assume the worst just yet.
Since you’re having to snoop on him online, I have to ask you if there’s something else going on here. Has he ever given you a reason not to trust him? Has his behavior toward you changed in any way? If so, I think it would be best to talk to him face to face about his feelings toward you before going behind his back any more. It’s important to feel secure in your relationship, so hopefully a good heart to heart will set your mind at ease. Good luck.
