This story contains mature or graphic content.
FYI—I’m not going to hold back, so, I’ve given you fair warning.
We have all had weird sexual experiences, but I don’t think we always share them, usually out of sheer embarrassment. Well, I don’t get easily embarrassed so here they are:
5. We have a small problem …
I met this guy at a party when I was nineteen and he was absolutely gorgeous. He had captivating eyes and a very handsome smile. He had a cocky confidence, which when I was younger really intrigued me (I know better now). Anyway, we hung out a few times, and ended up getting kind of drunk one night. We must have made out for half an hour, and after he had chaffed my mouth from slobbering all over me, I finally blurted out, “Are we going to have sex or not?”
He jumped up immediately, turned around, pulled his penis out, and put a condom on. (I still to this day have no idea where he pulled a condom out of that quickly). It was pretty dark in the room and he fell onto the bed, pants around his ankles. He started “kissing” me again, and pulled my skirt up. I could feel him directing his penis with his hand, trying to shove it inside me, without even getting me ready! I remember him spitting in his hand and rubbing it all over the condom.
He put his penis in. It was so small, it felt like chewed up bubble gum. He was thrusting and moaning; I think he really thought he was doing something. The condom was making crinkling, squeaky noises inside of me because it was too big on him. I laid there thinking to myself, seriously, can you get this over with? I humored him and moaned a few times, but he didn’t even deserve one moan. When he was done, he got up quickly and ran into the bathroom to clean up. I sat up and felt disgusted.
He came out of the bathroom and said, “Do you love this big dick?” After this day, I would be obsessed with huge dicks, getting excited when it was so big it hurt.
4. Why don’t you have another drink?
I dated one of my best friends from high school. It happened long after we had graduated, post both of us having kids. I had just left my daughter’s father, he had just broken up with his son’s mother. It was obvious we were codependent on each other, and our relationship was set up for failure. Whenever we went out together, it would end in a drunken sex fest. The sexual chemistry was right on, and—he had a big dick. But we had nothing in common except that we were friends and both had kids.
One night after we had gone dancing, we went back to his apartment and got into bed. He was kissing my neck and undressing me, and then eating me out. It was intense; I was sweating, and moaning uncontrollably. The motions were completely on point and then began to slow down, and then stopped. I looked down and realized what had happened, and thought, my friend, you are sleeping in my pussy, not a pillow.
3. Please stop.
This tall, handsome, black man, the epitome of a beautiful black man wants to date me! Too skinny, goofy, me. This was incredible. He was funny, we got along well, and I felt comfortable around him. One night after we had gone out to dinner we parked in a wooded area, just to sit in the car and talk. Of course that’s never what ends up happening.
We stated kissing, and he started playing with my lady parts. I was just getting worked up and about to let out a squeal, when all of the sudden he let out a squeal, and then another, and another. This was not a sexy grunt or even a moan; he was squealing like a porn star. I thought I was in the car with Jenna Jameson. I looked over at him and said, “Please stop.”
