Most women that I know tend to handle each breakup in very specific ways. That’s not to say that there isn’t the occasional breakup that takes longer to get over depending on how long the relationship lasted and whether the breakup was mutual or felt more like being dumped. Needless to say, this is why I worry about some of my friends more than others after a breakup, because their past behavior is a definite indication of how they will handle their current breakup. Some of their reactions I view as healthier than others, and some I just don’t understand at all, but these are the general breakup personalities that I’ve seen in my friends.
Zen Approach
This approach goes hand in hand with the women I know that believe strongly in karma and that everything in the universe has its place. For the most part they handle breakups well because they do seem to take the approach that the failed relationship “just wasn’t meant to be.” I don’t worry too much about the women that fall in this category, although I can’t say I understand their reaction. If their karma approach has merit, the guy that can’t stop chasing after women should have his foot run over by a car to slow down his chasing, but that never seems to happen.
The Mourner
Some women just seem to need to go through a proper mourning period before they can get over a breakup. During this tear-filled time you can’t say anything to the mourner without reminding her of “him.” Just accept that “he” will be the topic of most conversations until she has finally cried him out of her system. Once that happens you’ll have your old friend back again.
The Competitor
Some people call this woman obsessed or stalker, because she sees a breakup as one giant challenge to get “him” back. Although she’s definitely intense, I don’t see this woman as obsessed because it goes beyond the guy in question. She tends to be on the same quest to get the guy back after any of her breakups. When it comes to “winning back the guy” it’s the “winning” part that’s her true focus. Try to help her focus her competitive nature into winning the attention of a new love instead of chasing after the old one.
The Woman Scorned
The woman scorned is filled with anger. Usually she’s content to bad mouth him to anyone who will listen. Although there may be times when she’ll decide to run over a box of his stuff that he left at her place before returning it to him. Eventually her anger will subside, but you may want to keep her away from his car until all thoughts of revenge have faded.
So there you have some of the most common breakup personalities. You’ve probably seen some of these behaviors after your own breakups and those of your friends. Everyone deals with a breakup in a different way although some of the types seem to go through a longer process than others. Of course no matter which recovery method you’re prone to after a breakup a pint of Ben and Jerry’s can always help to make a breakup more bearable.
