flirting: to act amorously without serious intention
Are you in a committed long-term relationship? Do you still flirt with each other? If not, it’s easy to do, and it’s free! Here are a few ideas to get you started:
- Next time you’re at a party, make eye-contact and just gaze at each other for a few seconds; as though no one else is in the room.
- As you are running out of the house, turn around, look at your lover, and smile
- A gentle brush against each other as you walk by to reach for the paper towels
- A longing look into their eyes are you take a slow sip of your beverage
Some of you will inevitably disagree, but innocent flirting with your partner’s permission [yes, I said, permission] can be alluring and exciting. However, if you aren’t prepared to grant the same permission to your lover, then stop it! I am not promoting intentional and ongoing flirting; but spontaneous flirting can be very innocent, playful, and definitely a confidence-booster.
Although some may be open to receiving the slimy salacious catcalls, I am not referring to those. A flirty smile, a you-are-a-vision tone in their voice when they say, “hello,” or a simple comment like, “you are looking fine today.” Okay, a bit 70s, but you get the gist. Some women I know find it offensive and insulting when a man makes a comment about her appearance; even a well-meaning, respectful comment.
Recently, my husband and I went out to dinner at The Broadway Grill in Burlingame, CA. And with his permission, I coquettishly flirted with “Dean Martin” (aka: Matt Helm ). “Mr. Martin” is quite respectful and always shakes my husband’s hand to acknowledge him and his good sportsmanship. Now how would I react if Marilyn Monroe was singing to my husband; we’ll find out.
With all kidding aside, I do believe that flirting, staring, commenting, or coming-on to someone is inappropriate and disrespectful if you are in a relationship. But if you are lucky enough to receive a compliment from someone, why not graciously accept it. And if someone is inappropriate in their remarks, it isn’t necessary to pummel them with harsh words or stand on your soap box with an oration about the laws and consequences of sexual harassment. You simply, ignore the unwelcome comments and walk away. However, if your fervent sensibilities compel you to speak up, respectfully and simply state your distaste for the comment–and move on.
For those who are dating, roaming eyes will not get you a second date. It’s a sure way to end the first date early.
What does flirting have to do with etiquette? RESPECT. CONSIDERATION.
