Love is blind. In fact, sometimes it is so blind that it does not see when it’s about to be crushed until it is too late. Here are five indicators that the relationship end is nigh.
1. He becomes the “Vanishing Man.”
He doesn’t answer when you call. He is out when you stop by his house (though, strangely, his car is in the driveway). His texted responses turn from quick minutes into worrisome hours. If you try to plan ahead, he drags his feet and talks of having other plans. Even when you are with him, he seems distant and preoccupied. This could either be the first step in disengaging from you or he is up to no good with someone other than you.
2. He gets grouchy.
Does he seem to snap easily or get irritated with you for things that never really mattered before? The things that you disagree about become blindingly important to him all of a sudden. While it may not be his intention to cause a fight, it is his way of releasing frustrations with the situation. Or he may be trying to wrangle you into breaking up with him. During the early days of a romance, a couple will gloss over their differences and find each others quirks to be endearing. Towards the end of a romance, however, every little difference and quirk seems like a deal-breaker.
3. He keeps secrets.
In general, a person is only secretive when he or she has reason to be. If you ask him if you can check your email on his computer, does he hover over you to see exactly what you re doing? Does he outright refuse to give you access? These are warning signs that he s hiding something, most likely links to dating websites or other incriminating evidence.
4. He gives you the cold shoulder.
He used to be insatiable. He wanted you all the time (sometimes to your annoyance). He kissed you in public, held you in private. He showed you off to his friends and smiled at you while with yours. Yet now, he shrinks away from hand-holding and his sex drive has decreased. He has stopped inviting you to hang out with his buddies. Why is that? Because they likely already know he is planning to break up with you, and sometimes friends are lousy at keeping secrets.
5. He stops trying.
Biggest indicator of all. He doesn’t seem to care about your birthday. He doesn’t call you pet names or surprise you with loving gestures. He doesn’t go out of his way to make you feel special or wanted. When it seems he no longer cares whether you are around or not, he probably actually feels that way.
While these warning signs could indicate something as innocent as work stress, the best thing to do is to ask him outright, have you lost interest in me? Secrecy, doubts, and miscommunication will not help a relationship thrive. If you have any chance of staying with your boyfriend, you will have to be open and honest with him.
