Ever heard the term “chameleon” when it comes to relationships? Most of us have been in a chameleon situation before: he likes the Rolling Stones, you become a huge fan (even though you’ve always preferred the Beatles); she loves Korean food, you can’t stand it but decide Kimchi is your absolute favorite; and so on. You take on clothing, music, food, sports, even behaviors and overall lifestyle attributes, simply because your significant other does. Bottom line: like a chameleon, you change who you are, at least on the outside, to please someone else.
Sometimes, you realize you are so in love with someone that you’ve become completely dependent on them, losing your own identity to an extent. So much so, that when the relationship ends, whether as a breakup or a divorce, you begin to question yourself, your choices, and your future—since, what future is there now anyway, without your ex?
The thought of starting over is a daunting task—full of insecurity, doubt, and stress. Don’t let these feelings shatter what’s left of your self-confidence. The four phases of bouncing back begin with releasing the negative energy you have within, channeling it instead into getting excited about a clean slate, a fresh start, and the phoenix you will become as you rise from the ashes of a broken relationship and start to rebuild.
Celebrate this resurgence with a self-reinvention—find your true core values, your inner strength, and bring them back to the forefront of who you are. Based on stories from BounceBack members, one of the key things that heartbroken people forget about most during a breakup is to take care of themselves. Spend time focusing on and reinventing yourself—you deserve it.
When you’re ready for your “phoenix moment” after your heartbreak, here are seven helpful tips on how to reinvent yourself.
Focus on your health. Not only will you look better, you’ll feel happier. Improved self-esteem is a key psychological benefit of regular physical activity. In addition, healthy eating improves overall health and helps your skin glow. Who wouldn’t want these benefits? Start a workout routine pronto, and make a healthy-foods-only trip to the grocery store!
