I just couldn’t simply imagine how from seven hours acquaintance, to seven days getting to know each other, then we end up seven months now with each other as lovers and friends. I feel as if we are bound to it, as if everything is meant to happen which I do not know. He proposed his love together with the confession that he is married, but on a rocky road relationship with his wife and I undoubtedly believe and accept with undisguised feelings. So we build this relationship, a journey together like real couples, getting to know each other and starting to love each other deeper until the day we meet in person. I enter into the relationship without thinking what might be at stake for me because at that very moment, all I see is him and all I feel is love. He makes me feel important. He makes me happy, he put a smile on my face and music to my heart. He brought back the best days of my life which was taken away from me by time and tide.
I know within me, he is the man I want to spend the rest of my life, regardless of the distance between us, regardless of his status in life. I feel in my heart, he is the man I want to take care of and love with no ifs and buts, through thick and thin, I will be there for him when the sun goes down and the stars no longer shine. He is the answer to my never ending prayers, he absolutely fills the empty space in my life and he has made me complete as a woman that I am.
I know I love him in my own simple thoughts and I care much for him in my own simple way every day of my life. Be worthy in his eyes, in his heart and in a lifetime. But some good things never last and life is full of many unexpected twist and turns while fate has never been fair, just how fast we have gotten into it; it’s how fast it vanished which sadly left me teary eyed. It’s going well with his wife now . . . and I cannot argue with that. After all, I know he is married and has commitments and I’m just the other woman who loves him. I can’t help but cry and wonder why and seems like the whole world is tumbling down on me and I couldn’t find the reason to believe that it’s going to be over soon and that sooner or later everything will come to an end . . . just when you have it all, it’s going to slip right through your fingers like a sandstorm in a dessert of weary hearts. How cruel life is. It has never been fair. Only then I realized that I have loved too much, put everything in the line but in the end, I’m all left alone, dumped, I feel useless and again I failed. I lost and I’m back to where I begin “all by myself.” Now can anybody tell me, where is the fairness in life?
If things are meant to be, it will find its way, but if not it never will. Will finds its way to come to an end. I have gambled my heart all my life, I have hoped all my life but in the end I still bitterly end up in pain. I have more than enough share of pain and sufferings . . . it’s too much to take anymore and only now I believe that . . . too much love can kill a heart .
I have never failed when it comes to my career. Live with the comforts of life but not glamorous, like the rich and millionaires do—living in mansions, wearing elegant expensive clothes and accessories, glittering jewels, houses filled with world-class furniture. Mine is just a simple haven for me and my angels. Yet, as always, as it is there is always something missing. A house can never be a home unless there is a family filling up the empty rooms and laughter is there to break the silence enveloped around its barren place.
Now after all the failures and disappointments I realize, that if you love someone, ignore the fact that they might as well hurt you or disappoint you or worst leave you and the love unreciprocated. Just let them know YOU CARE! Go ahead! Be loud and express your love. The important thing is, you have loved . . . and we have no choice but to play along with the game of life. Either we win or we loose, but what matters is . . . we love . . . I have loved at all!
