Well, my story is kind of complicated because that is how I feel it is. This is my first time ever publishing anything. Well, here it goes … I have been married to my husband for thirteen years, but we have been separated for three of those years. I am in a relationship now with a wonderful man, but I can’t seem to put the past away, so I hurt him without wanting to.
My husband has someone else in his life, which he makes clear is more important than his own kids, but he calls me everyday from his job and we talk about us and what happened in our marriage. I have sacrificed myself for him a lot of times. I have also left my current boyfriend to try to mend my marriage, but it was no use. My husband in the beginning of the marriage was sweet; then he became aggressive and abusive. He even got to the point of raping me. Now that I have a second chance to be happy, I can’t seem to stop thinking it will happen all over again.
My kids mean the world to me and my current boyfriend takes care of them as if he was the father, and it hurts him to see me throwing myself, begging my husband to be a father to his kids. He said, “Leave him alone. I am their father; forget him, make your life over, and let me love you and the kids as you deserve.” How do I let go of a lifetime with someone, even though it was horrible, and start living my life now with someone who is willing to care and love me and help me raise my children?
