I just need a little advice on what to do in this relationship, because I just don’t know what to do anymore. First of all, I have been in this relationship for five years. Everything was going well up until our third year in our relationship. Everything started going downhill, our sex life wasn’t the same, we were arguing a lot, and he was staying out at all times of the night. He would even try to embarrass me in front of whoever was around us. I also thought he might be cheating on me, but I never had proof. That’s just a few things that we went through. Now, on the other hand, he can be a very caring person when he wants to be. He helps me with the kids that are not his, he helps pay the bills, and he buys things for me and the kids. Our relationship got real bad after his brother died. I was the only one that was there for him when he needed someone the most, and he didn’t pay attention to me at all. The same thing happened when my father passed away. He wasn’t even there for me when I needed him the most. Everything is still the same … maybe a little worse, and now I don’t know what to do. I love him a lot, but my feelings are starting to change toward him, and every time we try to talk about it, it turns into an argument.
Words of Advice
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I've been in situations where I've tried to go at a thing to fix it and all I got in return was a door closing in my face- no longer being able to control anything. That was a hard lesson to learn- since it literally tied my hands. Somethngs- in fact most things are out of our control. We can only have control of our self= self control. It might be hard not being able to fix a thing - not knowing what to do next as a result; however letting go can sometimes be the answer. Sometimes life forces us and leaves us no choice but to do otherwise. When that happens surrender needs to take place-surrenduring your helpless state to a higher force. Its important to remember that we don't have control over other people nor their actions. Emotional bonds can hinder us and leave us feeling helpless; yet its a life lesson that makes us stronger and wiser! So I sincerely hope that things change for you- that you will become stronger and rise above the situation and move forward inwardly.
Not sure if this is fact or fiction. It's a good read if it's fiction. If it's fact, it sounds as if both of you are hurting and your pain is keeping you apart from each other emotionally. If this is something you wish to continue, try to keep communication open, give encouragement and not a lot of criticism and hope it gets better soon.
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