Every day we hear another tragic story on the news regarding children in America. The horrifying incidents range from the latest victim of sexual molestation to kidnapping to cyber-bullying. Some completely rock our sense of security, such as the cases involving our church leaders or teachers who have been found guilty of abusing children. For parents trying to keep their kids safe, this type of news can be overwhelming. While there really is no way to protect our children all of the time, experts say there are certain things we can teach our kids—starting in the elementary school years—that will help them avoid some of the biggest dangers in our society.
I spoke via email with Kenneth Shore, PhD, a school psychologist, family counselor, and author of several books, including Keeping Kids Safe. He is currently writing another book about cyber-bullying, but says that even in the age of Internet danger, the largest threats to our children are often found in our homes. For instance, Shore explains that “from 1979 to 1997, almost eighty thousand American youths were killed by gunfire, almost twenty-five thousand more than the number of American soldiers killed in the Vietnam War.” Shocking, isn’t it? “Each day, on average, twelve American children ages one to nineteen are killed by gunfire,” he adds.
So, with that in mind, it’s absolutely critical that parents with guns in their homes lock them up in proper safes that children cannot access. It’s also essential to have discussions with children about why they should never play with guns at home, and about how, if they find themselves at a friend’s house and someone pulls out a gun, they should leave right away. Whenever I go back home (and I’m from the South, where gun owners are the norm), I ask parents before playdates if they lock up their guns. It’s the responsible thing to do with little boys who love to play cops and robbers.
Following is a list of other safety precautions to discuss with your children and implement within your household:
If your child walks home from the school bus stop alone, or if he is allowed to stay home alone after school, be sure to mention a few things to help him avoid entering a dangerous home. Many child molesters actually are neighbors or friends who may know your child’s schedule. Therefore, Dr. Shore suggests telling your child not to enter the house if he sees or hears anything unusual, such as a broken window or unfamiliar voices.
Discuss school bus safety! “Every year, some nine thousand children are injured and thirty-five are killed in school bus accidents,” says Dr. Shore. In fact, in October 2010, a school bus struck an elementary school child in Florida as he was crossing the street in front of his school. For this reason, and because school bus drivers cannot always see well, please talk with your children about watching carefully. If the bus doesn’t have its blinking sign out when stopped, it will soon start moving. If your child is too close to the bus, the driver can’t see him. Tell your child to always wait for a bus to move along before he crosses the street, or to make sure the driver can see him by waving to the driver first. Remind your child to sit down when on the bus as well.
Communicate openly about bullying. Talk with your children about how every child is special and how differences are good. This discussion is important because research shows that kids with learning disorders or special needs are much more vulnerable to bullying—starting in first grade. Talk with your child about why it’s so important to be a good friend and to never tease or agree with someone who is being mean to another student. One child can make a difference. By the same token, make your child aware that if he’s is ever the victim of bullying, he can talk with you about it.
