If you are a busy mother, you know how difficult it is to get time alone. Time to replenish and restore yourself—body, mind, and spirit. Time to revel in peaceful quiet, to sit and relax, even rest. In fact, it often seems like motherhood and personal quiet time are completely incompatible. In the spirit of mindful parenting, however, I believe that the two are interdependent. Let me explain.
Mindful parenting is one of those newfangled takes on positive parenting. In actuality, the practice it’s rooted in—mindfulness—is old news, for it is sourced in ancient wisdom gleaned from the East. This is how the organization, The Mindful Parent, describes mindfully parenting: “Mindful Parenting is a contemplative practice through which our connection to our child, and awareness of our child’s presence, helps us to become better grounded in the present moment.”
From where I sit, we become more mindful parents when we become more mindful people. This requires learning to be present to ourselves first. Do you recall the demonstration offered during airplane travel of how to respond in an emergency? We’re told to place the air bag on ourselves first, then place it on our child. If we can’t breathe from lack of oxygen, we can’t lend assistance to anyone we care about. Mindfulness works like that. If we desire to be more present to our children (in all the ways that count—physically, emotionally, and spiritually), we must be present to ourselves first.
So how do we begin this journey of becoming present to ourselves? We start by creating “Me Time.” We spend quality time with ourselves. We slow down, listen, and pay attention to what our body/mind is saying. In small doses, we give ourselves permission to be quiet, to be alone, to rest, whatever it takes to feel centered and harmonious within ourselves. Logan Pearsall Smith once said, “If you are losing your leisure, look out! You may be losing your soul.” Taking time for ourselves is good medicine for the soul. The journey to mindful parenting begins with soulful remembering of what it is like to be less busy and more leisurely; to have fun and enjoy the pleasure of our own company, something we rarely do as busy parents.
