Today’s weigh-in: 221.4 (a loss of 1 lb 8 oz since Tuesday, 09/01/09)
Week’s grams of carbs: 1,050 = 150 grams per day
Week’s Protein intake: 524 = 74 grams per day
Week’s Protein intake: 524 = 74 grams per day
Week’s Fat intake: 494 = 70 grams per day
Week’s wrkts duration: 3 hours 48 minutes
Week’s total cals burned: 2,892
Week’s cals after workout: 9,658
Week’s Aerobics 1 hours and 40 minutes
Week’s weight training: 1 hour and 30 minutes
Other (street hiking): 38 minutes
Today is my Birthday! I am fifty-three years-old.
I think the worst thing about being overweight, (here I speak about me—in my opinion only—and I speak for no-one else), is remembering how once it felt to be thin. If I’d never been thin, perhaps I wouldn’t now care so much. I don’t think I could sincerely miss what I’ve never had; I may dream of having it, and wonder what it would be like. But in this case I’ve been there and I miss it. I have, in all of my twenty-four years of being overweight, missed being thin! I want to feel good inside; I want to like what I see in the mirror.
I love cooking and I love eating, and I LOVE eating my own cooking! I will confess that a small part of me would like to just not care what I look like, but the world around us makes it hard not to see yourself through their eyes. Yes, my life is complicated by my love of food. But I know that I am not alone in this.
I hear of women talk that they are happy just as they are, even if they, too, had once been thin, they’ve accepted who they now are. But this thinking, this acceptance of self, doesn’t work for everybody. I—me!—have felt trapped (in a prison) all of these years. My feet hurt from too much weight. And I can’t bend over to tie my shoes without having to take a breath first. My doctor tells me that because I am a Latina—dark-skinned—I am a good candidate for health problems that typically begin with diabetes to high blood pressure, and to high cholesterol.
So here, now, I need to consider my health, if nothing else. I don’t want to always worry about this, which I do. There are plenty of other things in life to worry and fret over.
NOTE: This past Labor Day Weekend I believe I did pretty well. Together, I cooked with my family and allowed myself to enjoy the food, though in moderation. And I as well squeezed in time to work-out with my husband. A good workout helps in burning the extra calories I take in.
Confession time: I love my wine and champagne and realize that I cannot and should not have even a single glass to drink during the week. There are hidden calories in alcohol that I had not taken into consideration, and it is not an easy task to figure out (7 calories per every gram of alcohol, plus the residual sugars). Mauro Di Pasquale says, “The main problem with alcohol is not the number of calories it contains but rather the effect is has on fat metabolism. A recent study has shown that even small amounts of alcohol have a large impact on fat metabolism.”
Until next week … I bid you good night, for I will surely dream of food and cooking!
