In Part II, I wrote about the conclusion of my new discovery of having pre-mature menopause. My pre-mature menopause was due to surgery, what scientists and doctors classify as surgical-menopause.
In lieu of that article, my daughter had come over and wanted to use my laptop while I was preparing my research for pre-mature menopause.
She was going to get her emails on MySpace but instead found the word menopause in the search field and said, “Mom, what is this?”
“Oh, I am doing a research for myself and for an article on pre-menopause.”
“Why?”
“Because I am going through it.” There, I did it, I finally told her. I was afraid to confront my kids about it because I am still young and they might see me as getting old and aging. I think that I will be seen as a wise, respected, and loving woman just as I see myself.
“Oh, so is that why you have been snapping at me lately?”
“Have I? It wasn’t me, it was the hormones! I promise, I will do my best to not snap at you,” (or anybody else). “I didn’t know what was wrong with me but now I know and I am learning to handle it.” Indeed, I have. In fact, I am more conscious than ever about my acts. I can also use menopause symptoms as an excuse for my behavior but that does not justify the nature in me.
We both laughed and then I went to show her the articles that I wrote. After she read both articles she says, “Cool stuff, but mom, did you forget that I had the same surgery?”
“You did?”
“Mom, are you losing your memory too?”
“Oh yes, that too is one of the menopausal symptoms.” I can’t help but use humor; laughter is part of a non-resistant approach to menopause.
My daughter had an entopic pregnancy about a year and a half ago and was rushed to the hospital in excruciating pain. She was two months pregnant and they had to perform emergency surgery. We were all sad that she lost the baby but there was nothing else that anyone can do except for the surgeon to remove the embryo from the fallopian tube.
“So does mean that I am going to go through pre-menopause too?”
At this point, I didn’t know what to tell her. I felt bad, but at least she has the pair now. Yes, I am a young grandma. I said to her that if it were simply a matter of having more children because that is what she wants, then having them while she is young would be the wise thing to do. She did not seem to be moved with the subject so I moved on and attended to the family.
Who would know that one of the closest people to me went through the same thing? My own daughter! Memory loss? I doubt it, just a misplacement of memory.
Some of my friends talk about menopause like it is nothing. So why am I making such a big deal out of it? I guess it is because of the horror stories that I had heard of in the past and because those stories do not pair with me at all. When I was a little girl, I thought that all menopausal women were mean because of the stories that I had heard. Of course, that changed with time, self-discovery and education.
I talked to some of my male friends about their wives and menopause but it was taboo so I sorted out for my own resources and found Male Menopause? No Myth a CBS News Video.
According to the news video, men’s menopause is slightly different from women’s menopause, meaning that men will still produce testosterone and be able to have babies well into their nineties. When women go through menopause, their estrogen levels not only drop but also diminish in their postmenopausal stage, not being able to bear children. However, for women, once their menopausal stage is over, their symptoms cede completely while men still experience hot flashes and other symptoms up to their sixties, seventies, and eighties. I guess one outweighs the other.
