It’s not easy to recover from an eating disorder. In our society, having a certain body image is ideal and desired. Most women strive to “look good” on a daily basis. However, anyone who has ever struggled with an eating disorder knows that an eating disorder never really allows a person to feel good. In fact, it is usually the opposite. The person ends up feeling defeated and hopeless in her situation. What may have started out as a simple diet often ends in a debilitating disease. The person often feels ugly and unworthy which leads to a stronger desire to lose weight in the hopes that it will erase the negative view she holds of herself. Unfortunately, the more weight the person loses, the more distorted her body image becomes.
Possibly the cruelest part of this illness is the person’s distorted body image. This distortion does not allow for a clear perception of the body. In other words, if the person suffering from an eating disorder loses some weight or firms up her muscles, she cannot see it. This causes both confusion and frustration—others view them as very thin while they view themselves as overweight. The person is not “crazy” because she sees something different from the world; she is simply malnourished. A malnourished brain causes body distortion. In fact, the thinner the person becomes, the more body distortion she may experience. Eating disorders affect both the mind and the body. Therefore, treatment should include intervention for both. Without treatment, the desire to attain that “perfect body” (the one that they will never be able to see through eating disordered eyes) becomes stronger.
If you are reading this article and are struggling with an eating disorder, I encourage you to get help. Eating disorders are very aggressive illnesses that need aggressive treatment. The sooner you receive treatment, the higher the chances for success. It is not easy to seek out counseling especially when society tells us that “thin is beautiful.” However, remember that getting help does not mean getting fat. The goals of treatment are to help the person see herself accurately, so that there are no more distortions and to find alternative coping mechanisms that will provide her with healthier outlets for her distress. In addition, understanding why this illness developed in the first place is imperative so that it does not return or is not replaced with another unhealthy coping mechanism.
Lisa is a twenty-seven year old woman who entered therapy after her twenty-first birthday. Lisa was resistant at first to see a psychologist. She was referred for sudden weight loss, but did not believe she had a problem. As a child, she was always on the chubby side and was accustomed to hearing random comments about her weight from coaches, family, and friends. Lisa was always a perfectionist. Even as young as three, her parents recall her intense frustration with herself when she could not accomplish a task quickly and easily. In high school, Lisa decided to go on a diet because she was tired of looking “less than perfect” in her eyes. She had an idea of what her ideal body weight should be and was determined to reach this goal. She began going to the gym to work out every morning before school for two hours and then ran track after school. She set up a meal plan for herself that consisted of 1200 calories per day with little or no fat in her diet. This structured plan worked well during her senior year and she was happy to report that she lost ten pounds. She recalls looking better and feeling better at that time. The compliments she received from everyone about her will power, her drive, and her appearance boosted her self-esteem immensely.
Lisa went to college with the same plan in place. However, upon entering college, something shifted for her. In high school, everything always seemed to fall into place for her. People perceived her as smart, pretty, funny, and outgoing. In college, she struggled with the workload, the party scene, and the friendships she made. She did not expect to have these struggles and felt completely off balance. She was highly overwhelmed and felt much more insecure. She coped with these feelings by isolating herself and by the time she entered her sophomore year, she had only one friend left. She moved into a single room apartment and found comfort and security in going to class, studying, and working out at the gym.
