Care for the Family Caregivers

Earlier this year, my father was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia. As the disease progresses, my mother struggles more and more to care for him. Dad, who used to be fiercely independent, now relies upon her for nearly everything. Everyday, mom helps dad get out of bed, bathe, and dress. She prepares all of his meals, takes him to doctor visits, and administers his medication—all while balancing work demands and other everyday responsibilities. As dad’s intellectual and physical abilities continue to deteriorate, his caregiving promises to become even more exhausting and frustrating.

Every year, over 50 million unpaid family caregivers across the country provide care for chronically ill, aged, or disabled spouses, parents, other family members or friends. Chances are you have a friend or family member like my mom, struggling to care for a family member in need. To honor and recognize those selfless caregivers as well as educate the public about caregiving, November has been declared National Family Caregivers Month. Please take this time to recognize the hard work and sacrifice of those family caregivers in your life.

Here are a few easy ways to show appreciation and support:

Recognition
During the course of caregiving, there are times when the caregiver experiences feelings of isolation and loneliness. Letting the caregiver know you are thinking of them can make a significant difference in their overall well-being. Simply asking the caregiver how they are doing will let them know you care about them. A friendly visit or a phone call can lighten the caregiver’s spirits. Sending a card, flowers, or a gift basket will improve the caregiver’s day.

Time
Caregivers need time off from their caregiving responsibilities to relieve stress and prevent burnout. Offering a few hours of your time to stay with the caregiver’s loved one will provide respite and give the caregiver time to re-energize. If the caregiver has children, offer to be backup childcare or provide carpooling when needed. Bringing dinner, running errands or providing transportation to an appointment will give the caregiver a break from the daily run around. Helping with household chores the caregiver may find difficult or time consuming will give them more time to relax.

Thoughtful Gestures
Acts of kindness can have a positive impact on the caregiver and provide great assistance. Sending a gift certificate for their favorite take-out restaurant, the grocery store, or drug store can help ease the caregiver’s financial strains. Soothing music or an interesting novel can help the caregiver reduce their stress levels and sleep better at night. If you’re creative or crafty, consider giving something personal like a hand written poem, painting, or knitting an afghan.

If you have a friend or family member who is currently a caregiver, take this opportunity to recognize their efforts and give them a break from the stress and strains that come with providing care.

8 readers liked this story.
From Around the Web:
11.10.2009
Ann
I was the sole caregiver for my late husband and I am now the sole caregiver for a gentleman friend with PD. It can be a very lonely, stressful job. However, I love helping people and always have. I just feel the need to make someone's life a little bit better.
01.15.2009
Holly O'Rourke
Libra, Please know you are doing good by your Mom. Caregiving is one of the most difficult and underappreciated jobs out there and many people are unaware of what caregiving really commands of a person. Have you triend asking for help from family members and friends? It is true that in situations like these people's true colors do show but don't let that get you down too much. Try to seek out assistance from a local or online caregivers support group. Check with your local hospital, senior center, council on aging, meals on wheels, etc. to see what programs they offer. I feel for you and want you to know you are doing well for your Mom. Hang in there. Peggy- I'm glad you have the support you need to help care for your Mom. It must be a relief to know you have some respite and a helping hand when needed. You too are doing good by your Mom. I wish you continued strength in your caregiving journey.
01.13.2009
Peggy Gorman
I fully understand about caregiving,I have been caring for my 81yr young total care Mom.I have alot of people stop ,visiting nurses,meals on wheels stop everyday so lunch I don't have to worry about,just dinner.All these people are so wonderful and a blessing. I understand what you mean when you find yourself not being able to leave. Thank goodness I have a wonderful support from my family,meaning my boyfriend and children. I don't have any support from my brothers and sister,and its so sad. I also try to do family things ,having parties ,Sunday dinners to break up the week. It helps but its alot more work. I have to believe that I am doing the right thing and helping as much as I can . Libra you are doing the right thing by being with your Mom even if it doesn't feel that way now. There are so many different agencies that you should check into for a helping hand. Call your senior center to see what is available.
01.13.2009
Libra
I agree.I have been taking care of my sixty six year old mom since dec.23rd 08, she had a fall in the parking lot of her work and broke her hip.I am 45 with a boyfriend and my own life but.... have been in this house for 23 day's and my mom's sister nor brother will offer to come by and maybe let me leave for awhile let alone ask how I am doing. I love my mom but sometimes it takes something like this to see how people really are, I have been very depressed lately with the situation and wish I had someone to acknowledge me. I hope I did'nt sound selfish believe me it's not like that. I am stressed!!!
11.13.2008
Holly O'Rourke
Thanks, Mom but I think you're logged in under my account... you need to use your own!
It feels good to write.

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