This week’s post is about a book I’m reviewing in conjunction with Twitter Moms, Gotham Books and Penguin Publishing: Operation Beautifulby Caitlin Boyle is a must-read and a must-read now.
Boyle wrote this book after an impromptu life experiment that involved her fledgling self-esteem, a post-it note, and a mirror. And that is when history was made. Unbelievable, life-altering history: Caitlin, unlike so many women around the world, started thinking positively about herself. And in turn, she moved women across the nation and beyond to take their self-images into their own hands, demanding more than adequacy. “One post-it note at a time,” is what she asks us to do. The concept itself sounds so simplistic, even juvenile. Tacking up post-it notes all over the place whenever we feel we need an image pick-me-up? Well, yeah. And it’s a damn good idea. Common knowledge is that men are visual creatures, while women are more cerebral. But why is it that women base their low self-esteems on what they see all day long on commercials, in magazines, in the movies? And if at looking at images all day long can drastically alter the way we see ourselves, then couldn’t the same happen from reading positive words of affirmation?
Boyle captured comments and photos from women all over, from teens battling eating disorders to women battling chemotherapy. And let me tell you, if you think your hips are truly the end of the world, imagine losing every strand of hair on your body while dying in the hospital, staring into the tear-filled eyes of your children.
Sometimes, I wonder what I even have to think highly of. I spend my days covered in food. My kids, while the light of my life (really, I love those little guys so much it hurts), manage to make a fool of me almost daily. The needle on the scale is immune to gravity, always moving in the upwards direction, and my clothes are no longer trendy, but (gulp) comfortable. Sure, being a stay-at-home mom is where I want to be most of all, but it has taken a major toll on my self-esteem. And this is where Operation Beautiful came in.
After finishing the second chapter (fittingly titled “Fat Talk,” one of my bad habits), I decided to participate. We were out of post-it notes, but I did have a magnetic notepad on the side of our fridge. I stood there with my Sharpie in hand, and I wondered what to write. I closed my eyes and thought, “What can I do?” And then, I wrote:
If there’s one thing in life I can always do is make people laugh. Being funny has been a part of who I am for as long as I can remember. I grabbed my four-year old and together, we went into the bathroom and stared into the mirror.
“G, smile with Mommy.” I said.
He did. So did I. And then, my smile led to a grin. So did his. The grin to giggles, and the giggles to all-out laughter. And when I caught myself laughing in the mirror, I noticed what pretty teeth I have. I also noticed my dimple, which reminded me of something G asked me one day, (“Mommy, how did you get that hole in your face?”) Remembering that only made me laugh harder, which showed the crinkles around my eyes. And you know what? They looked fabulous. They complimented my lashes and hey, I’m a woman. I’ve had babies. I’ve nursed two hungry boys. I have stretch marks, battle scars, years of hardships, family drama, sadness, excitement, peer pressure, marriage problems (and joys), and you know what? I am real. And “real” is beauty.
So, encouraged by the first post-it, I set about writing a second round. And then a third. And by the end of the week, when I had finished the book, the notes had become such a familiar sight that I chose to leave them up. Some need a scotch-tape reinforcement, but they remain. The other day I heard my son asking my husband what the notes in the bathroom said, and he said, “Son muy buenas cosas de tu mama.” (“Good stuff about your mommy.”)
