Readers, I want to introduce myself by telling you that I’m a forty-one-year-old woman who’s had a mental health diagnosis for about eighteen years now, but was incorrectly diagnosed for years. The reason: I never told the doctors that I felt “too happy” or manic: I was just relieved not to be feeling depressed. So for many years, I would start to come out of a depression and because I was on the wrong medication, I’d start to go upward into a manic episode. Now, these episodes aren’t as severe; except when I “forget” to take my medication—because I’m feeling better. This happens to many of us with bipolar disorder who have trouble accepting that we have a chronic mental illness that we’ll likely be needing medication to treat for the rest of our lives.
The following hard-learned lessons have finally “sunk-in”: medication will always be part of my life, cognitive therapy skills will be helpful to my daily coping skills, my WRAP is not only helpful, but an indispensable part of my recovery, and finally having goals and taking the steps to work toward them will always be important for my growth.
Medication, the first point I mentioned, is very important to me, and anyone who has a chronic mental illness, regardless of the actual diagnosis. Medication doses should not be changed without permission from the prescribing psychiatrist. I’ve learned the hard way, that even though the medications may have serious side effects, I need them for my stability.
WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan) contains wellness tools, a daily maintenance plan, an action plan to deal with triggers, and how to prevent a crisis/or deal with one better if it should happen. A WRAP is focused on what we who live with mental illnesses every day can do to ensure our own wellness.
Finally, goals will be addressed in this article. Previously (three years ago), my goals were tied in with my mental health recovery. I had the goal of becoming a Certified Peer Specialist (peer counselor); I succeed, but it quickly became obvious to me as well as those in my orbit that this was a bad move for me. I was “sensitive” and overly “empathic” and therefore had trouble with emotional boundaries. This caused me a serious relapse and I resigned from the job after only two months. That’s not to say that others won’t be successful giving back what’s been given to them. I just can’t do it by working in the field. I have good news: I’m returning to college in the fall to work on finishing my bachelor’s degree in Information Science & Technology.
