Life happens whether we are ready for it or not, and in May 2005, my mom passed away after an extended illness. I’m not sure we are ever really prepared to lose a parent, especially a mom, who has loved and nurtured us all of our lives. I had more things I needed to talk with her about, and I know I wasn’t ready to let her go. Less than one month later, my husband fell from a ladder, suffered a head injury, and died a week later.
My husband was not only my life partner but also my business partner, and there I was left to run our business and my life alone. After getting through the initial shock of losing the two people who had the greatest impact on my life, I started to pick up the pieces with the help and strength provided by family, friends, and business associates.
I quickly learned that asking for help was the only way I would survive the grief and keep my business and my home intact. I’d often find myself looking around in a daze, feeling overwhelmed because my challenges seemed so great. Learning to put my ego aside and ask for the help I needed was a huge accomplishment. I discovered that people really wanted to help, but they didn’t know how. My request opened the door for them to give the support they wanted to share.
Two years have passed since that time. I sold my business and my house and chose to relocate back to the state of my birth, where my family resides. I am still bouncing back but with determination and the knowledge that I have much to be grateful for and so many good things ahead of me. I continue to ask for help from my circle of family, friends, and colleagues because I am driven to a life of simplicity and joy, and I know I won’t get there alone. And that’s just fine.
It may not be the death of a loved one, but maybe you’ve survived an accident or abuse or a traumatic layoff that left you feeling despairing. Whatever it is, I encourage you to ask for help. Who are the people in your life who would jump in and hand you that lifesaver, probably before you even finished the question?
