I not only lost my husband but he was also my best friend. My husband had multiple sclerosis, which is not why he passed away. The days previous to his death was to go to a friend’s house by himself (I say that because he rarely had or could he drive because of his MS). He spent three or four hours at his friend’s house working on computers. After he left the friend’s house he even went to the grocery store. Which is amazing because of the fatigue from the MS. So eventually when he got home, I said wow you really have had a burst of energy there. He smiled and said yea I feel really good. That was on a Saturday. We went to bed that night thinking I would sleep in since I work thru the week I get up at 5:30 every morning. I woke up on Sunday morning and went into the living room, which my husband got up before me and was laying on the couch. I asked if he was still sleepy, he said no just being a little lazy. As it was usually what we did on early on Sunday mornings, since it was too early to go to church. I sat down on the floor beside the couch in front of him and said would you like me to put on a movie, he stated yes that would be good idea. He did not slur his words he did not grab his chest, nothing. I start putting a movie in when I heard what sounded like a deep snore and turned so quickly towards him. And what I saw was just pure horror, his eyes was opened as wide as they could go and his pupils were fixed and dilated at me. I yelled and grabbed him, calling him, RAY, RAY, with absolutely no response as I was yelling, I was checking for a pulse, pulled him to the floor, cleared his airways and started CPR and dialing 911 at the same time. I did that until the EMS got there. But I know my husband was already gone as his face had already started to turn grey. They took him to the hospital anyway and when I got there. They rushed me into the family room where the doctor said there was nothing he could do, that he was already gone. So fast, no indications. We were going on with life until this brick wall. They said he had a heart aneurism. I asked the doctor why CPR did not help. He stated that if he was in a hospital with a team of doctors surrounding him, because of what it was nothing could have saved him. At night I go outside, stare in space and it seems so empty, and it is fitting because that is exactly how I feel inside.
