I am raising my daughter to be a Proverbs 31 woman. She is eight months old and I already have this in mind. The author of the recent DivineCaroline article, "Created in Her Image," Beth Rogers, might be outraged that I would say such a thing. Others who have shared Beth’s experience of being taught that the ideal, godly woman is submissive and weak might agree. But the truth is that we all have more in common than you might think.
There were many points in Beth’s recent article that I wholeheartedly agree with. First and foremost, I think that it is essential that we strive to see the fullness of who God is. If both male and female were created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27), then God must have both masculine and feminine characteristics. It is impossible for us to fully understand God. The more, however, that we explore the many aspects of God’s nature, the more multidimensional, the more dynamic, the more inclusive, the more accurate our picture of God. Exploring and embracing the feminine characteristics of God is an important part of both better understanding God and better understanding ourselves. It is unfortunate that the masculine attributes of God have been more heavily emphasized than the feminine, and I applaud Beth for calling attention to the importance of acknowledging this side of who God is.
I also agree with Beth that the Christian church has often mishandled the teaching about what it means to be a godly woman. As with other religions, scripture has been used to promote social agendas, such as the oppression of women or the promotion of slavery. Focusing on single verses of the text (called proof texting), rather than on what scripture is saying as a whole, allows for these types of misinterpretations and abusive teachings. Scripture is life-giving and empowering and should not be used in a way that is oppressive to any group of people.
Where Beth and I differ, however, is in our interpretation of Proverbs 31. For those of you who are not familiar with this passage, Proverbs 31:10-31 in the Old Testament of the Bible describes a woman who is often used as a role model in Christian circles. In her article, Beth describes this woman as “soft, tender, silent, submissive.” Beth describes how she was taught that this was what the ideal, godly woman should be like. Beth recounted how her mother’s emphasis on the importance of being a submissive woman negatively impacted her. I am glad that Beth shared her experience of this text because I think that there are a lot of women who have also received this same negative message.
I, on the other hand, have had a very different experience. I did not grow up in the church, at least according to most traditional understandings of what this means. I had a mother who was constantly trying to empower me to do great things with my life; to be anything but submissive or weak. My mother is strong-willed and lived in a generation where she would have liked to have been more encouraged to pursue her dreams. As a result, the early and consistent message that I received about being a woman was that I could do anything that I set my mind to. Not only that, I had an obligation to make the most of the talent that I had been given and literally “make noise” with my life.
It was not until my early adulthood that my heart turned toward God. The foundation for what it meant to be a powerful woman had already been laid when I encountered this text in Proverbs 31 for the first time. As a result of my early developmental experience, my reading of Proverbs 31 is quite different than Beth’s.
