Let me first start by saying that for the past two-and-a-half years, nothing has made any sense to me. I lost so many of my friends to death or they have just grown apart from me and went away. I lost both of my parents within three days of each other. Mom and Dad’s sisters and brothers and some of their kids came together to help with what they could, but where was everybody else that had called them family? My sister was there and my friend Kalea and Ray were there for the long haul. Other than them, I went home alone. I cried alone, I hurt alone, and wanted to die alone. Then I come to find out that while my mom and dad were in the hospital dying, some boy from where we went to church was texting bad things to my daughter. She was twelve at the time, and he was eighteen. I lost it so bad. The same thing happened just a few weeks ago—a man tried to accuse my daughter of doing something she wasn’t doing … He is suppose to be a Christian too. Isn’t it funny when you’re already going through hell, someone else will come along and add more weight to your burden. (I mean I had already sliced my wrist that week and cried to God, just to let me die.) What is going on in the church world? When did people stop caring about people? You see, my girls are never without me unless they are at school, and I never let them go anywhere without a responsible party. If a man doesn’t trust himself, they should stay away from all young girls—period. I mean, if I couldn’t trust myself not to kick a dog, I would avoid dogs at all costs. Why is it that these kinds of people also are the ones who get to climb the rung of the ladder when they are worse than the ones they accuse of everything? When will people stop pointing their fingers at everyone else and take responsibility for what they do, think, or feel and can’t or won’t control? I am so sick of this. People call themselves Christians, but there is nothing Christ-like to them!!! They put on a good show, but in reality they are full of a dead man’s bones. People who knock others down so they can feel bigger ... I hope it makes them feel better about themselves too, as they have finished off destroying an already falling apart family. Oh it’s always good to lift up children as long as it’s their children or some of their friends kids … that’s the problem, there are so many double standards in the church world today. I remember a church were my kids where bullied by the pastor’s family members and I was told to stay out of it … it was MY kids—I wasn’t about to stay out of it. Everyone should be able to come to church, be used of God, and feel safe while you are there. Period.
