A girlfriend and I were talking today about our respective situations at home. We are the best of friends, and often feel as if we’re one woman who’s been split into two bodies. She got the ebullient, frenetic, energetic half of us, and I got the level headed, melancholy, always sarcastic side of us. We’re a perfect fit in a friendship.
Today was a hard day for both of us, as last night we’d both experienced a difficult evening in the land of marriage. We shared our experiences with one another, and then our conversation evolved into an in depth heart chat about where we’re at in our lives, in our spiritual walk with our common Savior, our relationships with our husbands, our love and frustrations with our children, and our love-hate relationships with our homes.
What we agree on is that it’s all connected. It’s all a circle of action/reaction. My lack of energy to do anything about my home’s upkeep is reflected in the way it looks. The constant state of mess it’s in is a direct reaction to how I treat my children. If my home is a mess, I’m stressed and don’t take the time I should with my children. If my attitude with my children is gruff, my relationship with my husband goes immediately downhill. If my husband and I are not getting along, then my withdrawal into depression and a general lack of energy is reflected in the upkeep of my home.
Every single thing in my life is a reflection of how my relationship with the Lord is. I can say that I have a steady, ever seeking, always praying relationship with my heavenly Father, but if I truly did, wouldn’t it be reflected in everything around me? I would have the energy and motivation to upkeep my home if I were reading the word as I am supposed to be doing. I would be obedient in my duties as a housewife. If I were obedient in that area, that would also affect my relationships with my children, not only in reaction to my home being upkept, but also evidenced in me because I’d be taking in more of the word. And if my relationship with my children is where it’s supposed to be, then definitely my relationship and attitude toward my husband would improve. And that leads me back to the improved relationship that I say I want with my God.
But the proof is in the pudding. The proof is what I actually do. Not what I say I want to do but never get around to doing. Everything in my life is a reflection of my relationship with my Lord. The Bible states that “ If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5). Apart from Him there is no life. There is no existence. I’ve had this song running through my head today:
I need You more
More than yesterday
I need You Lord
More than words can say
I need You more
Than ever before
I need You Lord
I need You Lord
More than the air I breathe
More than the song I sing
More than the next heartbeat
More than anything
And Lord as time goes by
I’ll be by Your side
‘Cause I never want to go back
To my old life
That song rings too true. If I’m to take what is written in John, than apart from Him there is nothing. He’s the one who creates my breath and has blessed me with this life. By not taking care of it like I should, I am dishonoring my Father in heaven. My prayer is that I can make this song my prayer. Make it my goal. To live up to the words of it. Life is to short to waste it. I do not want to look back on my life when my children were small and wish that I had done practically everything different. That I’d taken the time to love my children, spend time with them, love their father, and keep my home the way they deserve to have it. My goal in my home life is to use my life to honor and be obedient to what the Lord has given me to do in His word. The only way I can know what he’s asked of me is to spend more time in it.
