I have been having these crazy thoughts of late and I have no idea where they are coming from.
Ok here’s the deal, I have been married for a little over two years now and well, it has been an eye-opener! My husband is a good man and I am committed to love and stay true to him. But, well, honestly he is not the man that I had hoped to marry. Ok, I know that that’s the way it is after every marriage but there is not one thing in him that I wanted in my husband. So why did I marry him? I really believe God wanted us to be together for a season and a reason. So here I am, praying and believing each day to be a true wife.
But I have just been unable to get rid of these thoughts and images—that the season with my husband is going to get over soon! I have tried rebuking it, binding it, praying over it but it only gets stronger. And I’m suddenly thinking of this guy I knew from college who is everything I ever wanted! I heard this voice deep down inside me yesterday, “You will be with him soon!” I feel so guilty as a wife.
I never want to be unfaithful to God nor my husband but I somehow feel deep within that God is preparing me for what is ahead! I do not know whether all this is just a figment of my imagination or there is really something to it.
But I do know one thing—my heart so wants to only please God and I will be true to my husband ‘til death do us part.
Watch this space for what happens next.
