For the past two years my husband and I have ventured from Nashville to my dad’s Florida vacation condo with our two little girls. Technically it is located on the outskirts of the Redneck Riviera in the Florida Panhandle, where airbrush t-shirts, beer in koozies, and mini golf rule. But because we’re high-class suburbanites, we’ve affectionately nicknamed our little piece of sandy heaven on the Gulf Papa’s beach. That way people don't know if we’re talking about my dad or perhaps Ernest Hemingway. Come to think of it, my dad does bear a slight resemblance to Hemingway when he grows a beach beard.
Having survived this family road trip twice now in the past ten months, I thought I’d share some tips for driving, and actually enjoying, an eight hour drive to the beach with two children under the age of five:
- Do invest in a portable DVD player with dual screens. It’s so much better than drugging your kids with Dramamine.
- Do pack some kid movies that your children have never seen.
- Do stock up on road snacks so you’re not tempted to buy a six dollar bag of stale trail mix from the gas station or stop at McDonald’s every 100 miles. Publix had a great buy one get one free sale a few weeks ago and I filled a snack duffel bag with lots of goodies, including cereal bars. I threw in some surprise bonus sugary treats, including the ever-popular fruit rollups (tongue tattoo variety ... I get a little crazy with the vacation prep shopping!)
- Do bring along a favorite book and stuffed animal friend from home, as well as your child’s pillow.
- Do stock up on adult snacks, like wine and cheese, once you get to the beach, as well as some breakfast foods because I guarantee your kids will get up earlier than you anticipate. Coffee at your condo or beach house is also essential as is beer. We tried Landshark, a new lager beer, from none other than the mastermind behind Margaritaville, Jimmy Buffett. We also tried the new Miller Chill. Both have a Mexican influence and were quite good, especially if you're a fan of Corona with lime, which is a must, in my opinion, as an ice-cold adult beverage at the beach.
- Don’t order two kids’ meals if your kids tend to be remotely picky and eat nothing but chicken tenders, nuggets, fingers ... whatever variety of processed chicken on the kid menu they gravitate towards. Order one kids meal and have the server bring two plates and bring the sippy cup kiddos their own beverage. Do you really want to buy a three-dollar cup of cranberry juice for your two-year-old?
- Don’t count on your kids going to bed on time or napping. And don’t be surprised if they sneak down into your bed at four a.m. for a snuggle.
- Don’t count on your kids getting along all the time. A precious pink rubber frog will be lost at a restaurant, only to be found and then crippled the next day when baby sister rips one of its legs off. Big sister will cry hysterically and a lesson will be learned about being responsible for one’s treasures. Or something like that. That is my PC version. There was more screaming, by the adults, in the real life scenario.
- Don’t forget to have someone take your family photo. You’ll appreciate this years later when you can actually prove that you were on all these family trips.
- Don’t forget to pack baby powder. It removes sand! It helps chafing and prickly heat! Why things like this are exciting, I don’t know!
- Don’t discount the back of your minivan or, in our case, SUV as a handy alternative to those nasty public restroom diaper stations. Somewhere in southern Alabama I plopped Miss A on some beach towels on top of our luggage and changed her wet diaper when we stopped to fill up on gas.
