Office Politics: Musings from the Corner Office

You don’t have to be a pure power player to want a room to call your own.

Seriously, all the “knowledge-sharing” supposedly fostered by open floor plans basically boils down to this: I know I want a space I don’t have to share. And you can be sure that higher-ups who claims to be high on cubes never had to actually sit in one. The housing market may be bust, but demand for a door is one business trend you can bank on …

The truth is that in most any corporation, where you are seated says as much about status and seniority as your title. For upwardly-mobile execs, the natural career progression charts something like this: Results = Recognition = Raise = Real Estate.

Once you land within the walls, however, the game of office politics really heats up … I know I’m preaching to the crowd with this one: size matters. When it comes to office space, bigger is always better.

Another fundamental? Location, location, location. Obviously there are only four corners to conquer on any floor, but there is a complex methodology to rating the rest of the real estate. For example, proximity to power is good, but proximity to the breakroom or bathroom is not so good.

Then there is the question of windows. It’s not just enough to have one (or more)—you have to factor in the view—outside versus inside, clear versus obstructed, plastic Persians or cloth curtains … You get the picture.

And everyone knows how you are furnished is a function of rank. Is your office suited out in polished mahogany or mere metal? Does everything match or are you stuck suffering in a suite of second-hand cabinets and a well-worn credenza? I mean, a couch can certainly confer cache, but not if it clashes with the chairs ….

Of course any well appointed leader needs nicely decorated corporate digs. From the framed family photos and modest mood lighting to the carefully selected assortment of coffee table books, it’s all about setting a stage to play up your professional success. Even something as seemingly inconsequential as the size of your plants can turn certain colleagues green with envy.

Last, but certainly not least, check your tech specs. The ideal match is a compact computer and a massive monitor, trumped only by the size of your flatscreen. I mean, how can you keep up with the Kardashians’ big business if you don’t have a double-wide personal plasma?

Take it from someone who has clawed her way up the corporate food chain from cube dweller to corner queen: once you get your foot in the door, slam it shut.

Remember, if you don’t have anything nice to say, the door to my palatial pad is always open …

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04.18.2009
JJ
This is so true. I very recently moved into a new "better " position for the next year and had to change to another building. I do not have an office now, and I don't like that at all. There are very specific corporate guidelines that are rarely followed... it really comes down to who you know and which high up exec wants you where.
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