There was a time when I ran with no purpose,
Just a child dabbling in the carefree.
My eyes had no heavy baggage,
Nor did my ears cling to never or no’s.
Each day gave me what I needed,
No notice of much more or better yet.
My delight came in small packages,
The gift was always the act of giving.
In corners, I saw the weak and broken,
Cast aside by this world’s priorities.
But I longed to hear their stories
And try on their clothes of strength.
I asked rules if they would bend a bit
So I could hop over the rusty fence.
The fields and their ditches called to me,
I tripped and fell but was sure I’d be okay.
Years and tears later, my name was branded
And important became the story of me.
I looked back, I looked forward,
And especially all around in circles.
The now was never good enough
Because worry couldn’t live inside it.
Unjoyful was the strong undercurrent,
Pulling me far from where I started.
The shutters to my heart closed tight
When love approached as dark clouds.
A scratch here or there hurt all my wounds,
Making my mind itch with doubt.
Then God’s deep voice whispered with light,
Offering me silence and acceptance.
He showed me that ego is a dictator,
Pushing for someone I couldn’t be.
Can I now tune in to melody, not noise,
So I can sing again in a chorus?
I want to clear my throat of fear
To taste the beauty of my blessings.
What if I stopped moving and thinking,
Would I lose the I was and I will be?
Hopefully, so I’ll sit more deeply and lightly
Where meaning rises from within.
