Every time I read the Sunday paper, I find myself religiously perusing the classified ads. From a “gently used Crockpot” to my latest lover, I’ve found some pretty awesome stuff. However, searching for something good on the classifieds is like searching for a diamond in the ocean—you have to go through a lot of water before you get anything particularly shiny.
Kitty vs. Hubby
While we all want to get rid of our spouses now and then, I’d hold on to your man, sister. He can do things to you that your cat just can’t (no matter how hard you try).
Photo source: mustreadstugg.com
Little Mr. Piggy
Okay, let me just state the obvious; the dude is not going to give you his address if he already knows you are trying to kill him. Duh. You should have said you enjoyed the butt grab and would like some more, then you’d have gotten his address, hopefully one more butt grab, and then the opportunity to slit his throat.
Photo source: vi.sualize.us
Time Travel
Listen up Trekkie, time travel is not possible—it just isn’t—no matter how much you drink, smoke, or consume.
Photo source: adflyer-adflyer.blogspot.com
TP Burritto
I don’t understand what the big deal with this one is—it’s just so obvious (and considerate!). After you eat the burrito, Tina provides you with the necessary sanitation devices you will use immediately following consumption.
Photo source: HeadlineHumor.com
Excuse Me Sir, I Don’t Speak Mandarin
Ohhhh! Thank you so much for clearing that up!
Photo source: DigitalDreamDoor.com
