My mother has donated over eighty-nine pints of blood and as a result, has probably saved countless lives over the years. I have visited a blood bank exactly zero times and have not given one drop of blood because I abhor needles (particularly when puncturing my skin) and feel queasy at the sight of blood. I’m scared of the pain and the possible fainting, but I still feel guilty. This fear is not only holding me back, but preventing me from truly helping those in need.
As December nears its end and we start thinking about the New Year, we usually resolve to better ourselves in some way. Many goals involve overcoming fear, but most are left unmet because of a lack of motivation. Perhaps, if benefiting the lives of others were on the line, we would maintain our determination. If we do good deeds in spite of being afraid and are able to conquer those fears through the process, the rewards are even greater. This year, let’s resolve to enrich not only ourselves, but also the world around us, through eliminating our most common fears.
Scared of Needles? Give Blood
Cognitive-behavioral therapy focuses on changing mindsets about the fearful object or situation as a way to alleviate anxiety and move past the fear. Therefore, those of us who are scared of needles or blood should focus on the positive act of donating blood instead of whatever scary images are in our heads. When we find the strength to visit a blood bank and sit down in the chair, closing our eyes and imagining how our deed will benefit others can give us the will to go through with it, and once we get past that first experience, our fear of needles or blood could be diminished. By confronting the scariness head on and using the desire to help others as motivation, we can slowly become more comfortable with the process.
Scared of Dogs? Volunteer at the SPCA
I used to be terrified of any dog bigger than a Chihuahua before my parents brought home a seventy-five-pound teddy bear of a black lab. By being forced to interact daily with an animal of such intimidating size, I learned that size has nothing to do with aggressiveness. If you’re scared of dogs, I don’t recommend going out and buying one, but having an obligation to spend time with them could help you overcome your fear. By volunteering at the SPCA, you’ll have the chance to walk, bathe, and play with dogs of all shapes and sizes. As you become more familiar with the furry canines, you just might grow to like them.
Scared of Public Speaking? Become a Classroom Volunteer
The mere thought of having to give a speech in front of a roomful of our peers leaves most of us dry-mouthed and terrified. But we will all probably have to speak publicly at some point in our lives, whether giving a toast at a wedding or presenting a project to our coworkers, so we need to find a way to do so without visibly shaking. The first step is to start small, perhaps by learning to speak in front of students. Because they’re younger, we might fear their judgment less than that of our peers. Volunteer for a career day at a local school or participate in presentations at school assemblies. By doing this, we help teach kids and practice our public speaking skills at the same time.
Scared to Swim? Make Lifeguarding a New Goal
I have friends who, for one reason or another, steer clear of swimming pools. One simply has no interest, but the other is scared of water. She knows how to doggy-paddle and the basic swimming moves, but the fear of drowning keeps her dry. One way to move past this terror is to take a basic beginner lifeguarding class. People who take this class gain confidence in the water and learn how to prevent themselves from drowning, as well as how to assist others in a desperate situation That knowledge can be powerful and will alleviate some of the anxiety that open water causes for some people. Letting the instructor know beforehand about the reasons for taking the class is a good idea so that he or she can make the training a little more specialized.
Scared of Rejection? Do It for the Sake of Others
Is there anyone out there who hasn’t been momentarily terrified at the prospect of approaching someone else, whether it was to ask for a date, a sale, or even the time? There are few things worse or more crushing than public humiliation, but if we never work up the courage to ask for what we want, you guessed it—we’ll never get what we want in life. This is one of the fears that holds us back the most, so it’s even more essential that we eliminate it from our lives.
A possible solution is to volunteer for a charity and solicit others through that organization. Yes, walking up to people or cold-calling them is still scary, but by doing it for a good cause, we take ourselves off the line. Once we see that most people are quite easy to talk to, approaching them for ourselves becomes far more feasible.
It’s bad enough when fears prevent us from improving our lives, but when they conflict with our ability to do good deeds, that’s when we know it’s time to banish them from our lives. The strategies for conquering what’s scary may seem extreme or far too frightening to consider, but if we can focus on a greater good, that just may be the catalyst we need to tackle our fears and start making the world a better place.