As neighbors go, Muffin and Eclair typically don’t give me too much trouble. They keep to themselves, mostly, and mind their own business. But occasionally, they’re a little on the noisy side.
Yes, like so many of us in suburbia, I may not know my backyard neighbors’ names, but I sure know the names of their dogs. They are small, expensive creatures, let out only to do their business in the neighbors’ small backyard, which is visible from my kitchen window. Someone always goes out with them, which led to one memorable incident last year when it snowed and Hubs and I took the kids out in our own backyard for a little sledding. One of Muffin and Eclaire’s teenage owners was outside with them on their side of the fence. Once they were done, Eclaire ran back inside. Muffin, however, was mesmerized by the snow.
“Come on Muffin,” she called. The dog ignored her and continued sniffing at the ground, ten feet away from her.
“Come on Muffin,” she said again. “Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin, come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on. Come on. Muffin. Muffin! Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin. Muffin. Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin. Muffin! Muffin! Muffin! Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin, come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on. Come on. Muffin. Muffin! Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin. Muffin. Come on. Come on, Muffin. Come on, Muffin. Muffin. Muffin! Muffin! Muffin! Come on. Come on. Come on.”
“Just pick up your damn dog,” I muttered to Hubs after about fifteen minutes. “Pick it up and go inside. For the love of Pete!”
After about thirty minutes, the Muffin Monologues proved to be too much for us. We gave up on our sledding and as far as I know, our teenage neighbor was out there trying to convince Muffin to come on for the remainder of January.
I hadn’t seen or heard much our neighbors since until a couple of weeks ago, when I was cleaning up the kitchen and heard barking in our backyard. I looked up and saw Muffin and Eclair standing on my back deck.
That’s odd, I thought. They must have crawled under the fence. I scanned their back yard and deck, but didn’t see any signs of their owners, which was doubly weird. After a moment, I went on with my business, figuring that they’d realize soon enough that their dogs had escaped and would lure them back through the fence with luxury doggy treats or whatever it is that floats Muffin and Éclair’s boats.
But the next day, I noticed that the dogs were in our backyard again. And the next. And the next. I was always busy and they were never in our yard for more than a few minutes at a time, so I didn’t think too much about it.
