At home, I carry around a Petronas green-coloured notebook (you know the green I am talking about) with the word ‘peace’ emblazoned at the bottom corner. On the next page, the manufacturers/designers felt that the following words would most likely inspire the buyer; a.k.a me: “When you are one with yourself, life becomes magical ... you can get whatever you want.”
It did not inspire me, though. Nope. I bought it at a time when I lost peace of mind, and was looking to get it back into my life. I was browsing through a bookstore and saw a notebook with the word ‘peace’ and thought, “Aha! There you are.” It did not matter to me that it was overpriced, it symbolized a certain meaning to me—at the time. So I bought one.
It is now almost three quarters filled, and it may be time to find a new one. I wonder what I will choose now that I feel I have re-gained that peace of mind I once lost all too recently. The thing about being at peace with myself, I think I have it figured out. I think.
One of my daily morning routines, at around seven in the morning, is that I spend some twenty to thirty minutes taking down quotes from strangers’ Tumblr accounts. If you have never heard of Tumblr, well, basically, it is a condensed blog—or more like a graphic journal of some sort, with pretty photographs and meaningful quotes all jumbled up together. If you want to know a person, I would bet a Tumblr blog is the best place to start. It’s like their personality and belief system on display.
I do not keep a Tumblr blog, however. I prefer to collect my favorite quotes and keep them in a notebook, written in my big, round, messy handwriting. It feels more personal that way. Also, I’m more likely to read them back in the pages of a notebook, instead of in between online ‘pages’.
Oops. I may have sidetracked there. What was I about to share? Oh yes! Being at peace with myself. The last quote I took down seems likely to become a future favourite, perhaps even important enough to go on the “Vision Board,” right next to a photo of John Mayer (who I am planning to catch live in a few months!)
The quote said,
“There is an Indian proverb that says that everyone is a house with four rooms; a physical, an emotional, a mental and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person.”
And that is how you have ... peace. I’d like to add—start with the spiritual room. If you start with that, the other rooms will take care of itself. I feel, I believe. I try to.
Another thing, have a routine you can look forward to, every day. That always works for me. My mother and I, we enjoy hours of gossip session every morning. I reckon the breakfast table my father bought two months ago is my favourite piece of furniture at home currently. It’s solid wood and high enough for me to dangle my feet from. Hehe.
Just hours ago, I had one of the happiest conversations with my mother. There are some things I used to pray silently that she would ask but never did. For years, I tried to send her mental signals, “Please ask me about this. Please. I don’t know how to begin, unless you ask.” They were the same things I have yearned to share, but never could get up the nerve to. Many times, I opened my mouth to start, and ended up saying “Aaaah ...” followed by some mundane detail about a random friends’ life I have not much concern for, to be honest—just because I chickened out. It was my secret, one I was not sure how she would feel about. Would she approve, disapprove?
