Ever since I was a little girl, I was fascinated with this notion of “Happily Ever After.” I saw it everywhere I turned: Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin. All of these movies I watched countless times geared my little brain to believe, if I tried hard enough and looked in enough places, I would eventually find my “happily-ever-after.” I would find my Prince Charming and be swept off my feet into the great forever of love and happiness. And, though I believed this and was convinced it was my fate, my surroundings sort of taught me otherwise.
I was raised by a single mother and was rarely ever around adult men. My mother was more focused on earning a living and taking care of my little sister and me to have a stable mate around. She had boyfriends occasionally and was even married for a brief blip of time, but most often, these relationships never lasted. With this as my childhood, men coming and going, never to be seen again, how had I possibly grasped this notion that love was forever and I would soon find the man of my dreams? Although my mother most likely wasn’t trying to teach me this, she showed me the greatness of living in the moment and letting go.
I am now twenty-four-years-old and my view of Mr. Right has started to change. After years of relationships, arguing, and break-ups, I have learned one magical philosophy: “Nothing is permanent. Everything changes. Be here now.” For so long, I hoped for each new suitor to be “The One.” The one who would love me so much it hurt. The one who would marry me and take me away from all this strife. The one who would never hurt me, always care for me, and be my Knight in Shining Armor. Every time I met a new lover, my mind would immediately spin and question, “Oh my god! He’s so AMAZING! I bet you he’s the one I’m going to marry.” Then, a few days, weeks, or months later I would be proven wrong and all my hopes for the future would crumble. I’d be back at square one. There were so many times when all I could do was smile and sing, “Another bites the dust...”
Today, I feel like a new woman. An actual woman. One who lives in the moment and appreciates all the experiences life is offering her. I still have those random “Is he the one?” thoughts, but appreciate them and let them pass. I still fantasize about my wedding day and little babies running around the house, but feel gratitude for this love I have to give and know my life will end up the way it is meant to unfold. I’m so happy that I have so much love to give this world and am able to embrace all the love I have been given! I am also aware that “...this too shall pass...” I am conscious of the lessons being presented to me and allow them to become part of my life process.
I’m looking forward to getting married one day. And when that day comes, I look forward to experiencing it fully and without abandon. Until then, I’m choosing to enjoy my experiences and rejoice in living in the moment. See you around Man of My Dreams!
[Author’s Note: Since writing this article, I have found my “Knight in Shining Armor” and plan to live happily- ever-after, finally!]
