First Date: So Confusing!

After emailing a guy for six months (a long-distance “friendship.” We’re both in our mid-thirties, and both workaholics), we finally found the time to meet up. I was in his city; he texted if I want to meet up for drinks. He was approximately thirty minutes late, as “he got stuck in a call,” He was also badly dressed (jeans, wrinkled t-shirt with a hole in his sleeve—he’s rich and probably doesn’t care what people think). I felt like we “clicked” immediately and loved his sense of humor. He immediately asked me to tell him about myself, I could tell he liked the way we clicked when he started getting nervous, texting some friends (a couple who was in town) who were supposed to join us (I didn’t know that he invited his friends to our “date”).

They showed up ten minutes later; it was noisy at the bar and he mostly talked with the guy while I exchanged some words with the girl. It was impossible to get a one-on-one conversation that night. I was jetlagged from long travel, he had a long work day, and it seemed like we both got tired—maybe he got bored because I became really quiet. When we left the bar, he ran out the door with his friend, while the girl and I walked behind them. He asked me if I wanted to walk over to some other place but I was so exhausted that night, he hailed a cab for me. He kissed me on my cheek and said “Talk tomorrow.” I never heard back from him the next day, so I wrote him a “thank you” email. He just replied, “Let’s touch base later.”

I didn’t hear from him any more that weekend and had to leave town a day earlier. I informed him about it with two emails, he said he “didn’t see them,” while he was lying at some pool the whole weekend. I suggested we get together for drinks the night before I leave, he said, “He won’t be back before midnight.” I am over it, seriously. I texted him one more time, he replied that he looks foward to when I’m back in town. One person can’t do the work alone. I really like him for who he is, I don’t care if he has cash or can have every woman he wants to. I have my own career. However, we clicked and I’m confused and irritated. Not sure what to think ... Please let me know your thoughts or some advice. Should I give him a second chance? I really like him.

1 reader liked this story.
From Around the Web:
07.19.2011
MJ
this is exactly what i hate about us....women. We are smart. We have this gift called "instinct". We find out things about guys they don't even know they have. But when comes to men.....we act so stupid. And then we whine, complain and talk our friends heads off. It would be nice if once and for all we do self inventory, take responsibility that men treat us like crap because we let them. Wake up!
07.16.2011
Mandy Hanks
I know I am trying to find excuses like so many women do. After emailing back and forth for months it was great to finally meet. I was curious and baffled how rude he acted. Even if he has women throwing at himself from every side, it is NOT an excuse to treat people rude like that. He said he looks foward to next time I'm in town. I will be there for business and will let him know when I'm in next time but certainly I won't make any more efforts. If he wants to get together for a drink, fine. If not, I'm moving on.
07.16.2011
It_Gyrl
My dear, YOU think there was chemistry; he has given several signs that it was just a 'get together'. Do you think he would be so vague and 'miss' emails with a big client of his? No, he'd go after it with gusto - and he'd do the same for someone he's really interested in. He would have found some excuse to gear the conversation towards you, he would have called or texted the same night to see if you got back to your room safely (since you were tired), even if he's super busy he would have made a PDA notation to call or text you the next day, 'touching bases' sounds like something one would say to a client - not a potential love match...plus did he bother to thank you back for having wonderful time?, he seems to not be giving reasons but rather excuses (not seeing email, not back before midnight, etc.). If he really felt you clicked, all of the things you did to get his attention, he would have making the same effort to get YOUR attention. I'll have to agree with MJ on this one.
07.15.2011
MJ
sweetie.....what do you "really" liked about him? for who he is? his jeans and wrinkled tshirt with a hole in the sleeve? The picture that i see in my head while reading this post is that this guy is an a$$. Read your post as if it was written by a friend of yours ......what would you tell her?
It feels good to write.

Your stories, musings, and advice are welcome here. We know you've got something to share, so jump in!

Article_sweeps
Most Liked Stories
Loader_buff
Sweeps_offers_article_300_top
Win a $10,000 escape to Jamaica! Enter as often as you wish.
Win a $10,000 escape to Jamaica! Enter as often as you wish.
VIEW ALL