“I can’t focus anymore. Can I kiss you now?” His eyes widen when the word “kiss” stumbles out of my mouth and soon a smile replaces his surprise. I don’t wait for his reply but put my lips on his, shockingly he wasn’t a bad kisser. His hands slowly creep up my back, holding me closer with his thin but strong arms and he pressed his slim, fragile body into mine. I felt the middle part of his pants tighten while he pushes me against the screen of my front door. I am sure my neighbor is enjoying this show. I couldn’t say the little event wasn’t hot … but … that was all I needed from him. I pull away and smile at him while he tries to grab me back in his arms.
“Thank you for walking me home. Good night.”
“Do you want me to come up?” He was panting a little trying to regain breathe.
“No, thank you. Good night!” I ran up the steps to my door, turning back to give him a big smile as I open the door and then … I was enlightened! Alvin would never know why I didn’t invite him up as the girls and I will never know why some guys don’t call back. I had a great time with Alvin and we share a moment that I will always remember but that doesn’t mean I would like to pursue anything else with him. Because I know, he is not my kind of boy. It is the same things with those guys who disappear into a black hole after a date! Who cares why they didn’t call or continue the relationship? The fact that they didn’t say it at all, “they are not the guy for us” is as simple as that! Why do we have to let our insecurity ruin the fun experience and murder our self-confidence by thinking something is wrong with us? Why can’t we just take things as it is and be glad we had a fun moment with someone new? I guess it’s a part of being a human ... if we were not so harsh on ourselves; the entire psychology industry would be out of a job. I wonder what would happen if we save our money and time we waste on self-torturing with our shrinks and actually do something to make us happy! How would that be for a change?! Well, I can only say for myself and it works pretty great for me!
