“How are you? Both A and B are married already. How about you?” This was asked by a friend. This question is one of the most dreaded questions one dares to ask me every now and then.
Actually, it’s not only A and B are married now but most of my friends—my three high school best friends. Although, some, if not married, are in a serious relationship, two of us out of ten, I guess two are still single, unattached up to now, and that’s just so sad.
I would like to answer her in two years since I really intend to marry at the age of thirty but I’m twenty-eight now, turning twenty-nine this year and I’m not even in a relationship to consider getting married in two years time. I have two sisters younger than me. My sister was married last year and the other one plans to get married next year. So if I am getting married next year, in case someone comes along to marry me, I have to postpone it up to year 2011 because they say, siblings can’t marry successively the same year. It’s bad luck! So hopefully, I will get married at the age of thirty-one, which is a year past my ideal marrying age.
You know, it doesn’t really matter if I marry at the age of thirty-one or thirty-two years as long as there is someone who is willing to marry me (of course, someone I am in love with and who is in love with me), but what’s sad is that there is even none to begin with and that’s the most depressing fact.
I can’t sleep much for two days now because I’ve been thinking about this thirty-six-year-old guy I met in chat who had been nice, sweet, and caring to me for the past two years now, in fact he even sent me a Valentine’s present. But I just don’t where our friendship would lead us to.
He has a girlfriend but says she’s not the right girl yet so he isn’t marrying her yet. He says he likes me and I’m special to him but I just don’t know why he can leave his girlfriend and visit me here. He says he misses me but he doesn’t even call me. I know we live in two different worlds—he’s from the United States and I’m from the Philippines, but I don’t see that a problem but I know a lot of American guys who visited a Filipina they like, get to know her, and married her eventually. If a guy really likes a girl, he would do anything to see her. And if he’s serious, he would visit her and marry her.
He says he is living in a fast world where work is the most important thing in his life now, but he is taking it slow when it comes to us. Or maybe, he doesn’t like me that much to begin with.
What do I like about him? Not just because he is American and has good genes, but he is really sweet and caring. He takes time out of his busy schedule just to talk to me for five to ten minutes to ask me how am I … what’s keeping me busy, etc.
Later on, I found out that aside from his good looks, he is a hard worker but tries to attend Catholic masses every Sunday. I like spiritual guys. I wanted to think he might be the one but what if he turned out to be not? I’m scared to invest my time and feelings again to somebody because I fear it would only lead me nowhere. I’ve had other prospects before him but I lost interest because nothing even happened.
I hate to say “I wanted it to be him” because I think I’ve said it a million times to my love interests that’s why I wanted to take this season as an opportunity given to me by God to accomplish a lot of things.
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