There are roughly one million thoughts and worries swarming through our heads on a first date. Is this a good match? Was that story I told funny-weird or just weird? And if the date takes place at a restaurant, the anxiety increases tenfold. Do I have food in my teeth? Did I order too little/too much? However, there’s an upside to having that first outing center on food—it could indicate whether a second date’s in the future.
Food-ology and First Dates
Food-ology is the study of the connections between personalities and eating habits. Juliet A. Boghossian, a behavioral food expert who came up with the idea, believes that everything, from how we order to the foods we chose to the pace at which we eat, reveals more about our inner selves than we realize. She’s quick to point out that there’s only so much we can tell from a first date—“[It’s] too early to tell, [since] actual eating habits are altered to portray the best behavior,” she explains. But there are some minor things we can watch out for that might give us major insight.
Menu Manners
Pay attention to the way your date orders his or her food. Menu preferences can indicate the way a person operates outside of the restaurant, too.
Adventurous, Willing to Try New Things
A person under this category will show interest in the specials, ask for the waiter’s favorite picks, or make a point of trying something new. According to Boghossian, someone like this “will challenge [his or her] partner to new heights.” Excitedly exploring uncharted food territory often extends into an openness to change and new experiences in life.
Stable, Prefers Routine to Spontaneity
If your date tells you he often orders the same dish at most restaurants, chances are he’s not a risk taker and finds comfort in routine. Someone who hesitates when trying unfamiliar foods probably has a fear of change, so if you’re looking for a partner up for anything, keep searching. But those craving stability should look no farther, says Boghossian.
High Maintenance, Likes Things His/Her Way
Remember the way Sally from When Harry Met Sally orders? Basically, she created her own dishes at every eatery she frequented, and if your date orders similarly, he or she’s probably as stubborn and demanding as Sally was. This type of date “will debate for debate’s sake and yearn[s] to be different just to stand out from the rest,” Boghossian theorizes. But with that unyielding attitude comes the potential for creative and mental invigoration, too.
Some of these character hints become more obvious after the first few dates, such as the person consistently pulling from the specials menu or ordering a medium-rare hamburger every time you dine out. Plus, people tend to monitor themselves on first dates out of politeness (personally, I try to hide my pickiness until at least the third date), so keep that in mind when analyzing your date’s food selections.
The Best and Worst Signs to Look Out For
Sometimes people let their true colors show during the first date, unintentionally or not. Boghossian feels that if your date does any of the following things, it can give you an idea about your love match compatibility.
The Good
- Makes frequent eye contact during dinner, especially when you’re talking
- Tries to match you in terms of eating pace
- Waits until you’ve both received your meals before eating
- Asks you about your favorite foods, restaurants, or anything that demonstrates an active interest
- Offers a sample from his/her dish
The (Potentially) Bad
- Focusing on the food instead of conversation (or you)
- Starts eating when you’re still waiting for your meal
- Doesn’t make eye contact
- Eating at a haphazard pace, not paying attention to how you’re eating
The Ugly
- Orders for you when you’ve given no preference
- Being rude or aggressive toward the host and/or waiter
- Makes snide comments about the way you eat
- Forgets wallet or purse, making you pay for the meal
- Remembers wallet or purse, but assumes you’ll pay for the meal anyway
Since we’re usually on our best behavior, first dates can’t provide an absolutely accurate look into someone’s personality, but it can give you somewhat of an idea. At the very least, first dates offer glimpses of things to watch out for on subsequent dates. Analyzing people via eating habits isn’t an exact science and shouldn’t be treated as such. As Boghossian puts it, food-ology’s “not the deciding factor, but an insightful tool to support your experience and objectives when making decisions.” Of course, if he or she bosses around the waiter or conveniently leaves all forms of payment at home, there’s no need for deep examination—use common sense and ditch the date!