Maybe We Could Be Soul Mates?

When I told a friend that I was in break-up recovery, she didn’t hand me the name of her therapist, she lent me her Sex and the City Collector’s Gift Set. I had caught reruns of the show on the few nights I watched television outside of 60 Minutes and Frontline, and while I loved the show for Samantha’s bawdy comments and Carrie’s commitment issues, every time I caught a rerun, I learned the lesson that I needed. It became my modern-day version of the After-School Special, and I was hooked. So a month ago, between tears, I sat down with a glass of red Zinfandel, some dark chocolate, and started on all six seasons of its high-heeled wisdom.

By the time I had moved through four seasons, there was one quote from the character of Charlotte that resonated with me.

“Maybe we could be each other’s soul mates. And men could be these great nice guys to have fun with.” I thought she had something.

Most of my women friends have been my soul mates, because when we speak of our joys and sorrows, we speak from the depths of our souls. Meeting for tea or a walk on the street, I’ve learned that not all relationships are perfect. I’ve also reacquainted myself with my soul mates, which I’ve realized is an important tool in healing from a break-up.

I had lost one of my soul mates long before I lost my relationship. This happens to women when they begin to get knee-deep in a relationship, and it happens again when the relationship starts to go south. As much as soul mates like to confide in one another when things are going good, and analyze when things are going bad; when the intimate relationship dives into an abyss that women aren’t sure they can climb out of, it can be hard to come clean to your soul mates. I believe this is when soul mates lose each other; it has to do with pride. It’s what happened to one soul mate and me.