Birth Order

By: Not Just The Kitchen (View Profile)

Are you a very neat person? Do you try to color coordinate your clothes? Love making lists? There’s a good chance you’re first born in your family birth order.

This refers to whether you were the first, second, or came later in your family.

Your birth order affects your personality and nearly every aspect of your life, but it is NOT an absolute, indelible mark. It’s only one of many factors in personality development. And no one order’s better than another; but it can be reversed or turned around by illness, early death, or the mental incapacity of a sibling.

The first-borns often are high achievers and are very conscientious, reliable, and loyal. They’re also scholarly (not all the time, though!), and feel better being in control of a situation (I know I do!).

Why? The parents. It’s the first baby and while there’s a lot of excitement and anticipation on the parents’ part, there’s also a lot of pressure and demand from them to be the best.

This can result in two basic types: compliant and wanting to please, or strong-willed and aggressive. (It’s possible to have traits of both.)

First-borns often have to grow up fast and become “little adults” before they’re ready to be.

If the first is a female, she may be another “mother” to her siblings. If there’s a youngest brother, he may be “mothered” by sis even through adulthood! With the oldest brother, however, it’s mutual respect and a friendly rivalry.

A special note: Only children tend to have first-born characteristics, only more intensified.

Here are a few tips for coping with this particular status:

1. Relax (can be TOO active. This is very true, for many are workaholics.)

2. Learn to say no. (Don’t try to do everything and be everything to everyone.)

3. Don’t aim for perfection.

4. Keep paying attention to details.

5. Keep being organized.

6. Develop a sense of humor.

Second and middle-borns tend to be a bit opposite of first-borns. A middle child can be: A loner, quiet and shy, sociable, outgoing, friendly, laid back, a peacemaker, aggressive, very competitive, or not at all. (Unpredictable!)

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posted: 05.05.2008
Kristin B
So very true. My family is a little odd (divorce can do that to a family) and I'm actually the first, middle, last, and only child. First of my Mother's Last of my Father's In the middle of my two siblings my sister is 15 years older and my brother is 12 years younger, and the only child born between my father and mother together. When I looked over the article I noticed alot of the features from the oldest in my sister and the youngest in my brother and a little bit of everything in me due to my interesting family. Awesome article.
posted: 11.30.2007
Rebecca Brown
Wow, so interesting to read this while keeping my birth order (and my brothers') in mind. It's a little scary how accurate some of these things are!
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