What I do is “take a risk” on my husband and have faith he’ll do what he says he’s going to do. As we keep our agreements to each other, we build a “trustworthy” relationship over time.
5. Conflict Builds Intimacy
Never be in relationship with anyone you don’t want to fight with, otherwise you risk building. It is through conflict and disagreement that we give ourselves the opportunity to understand more of the other person’s point of view.
My husband and I come from two different cultures. Our world-views often clash. Believe me, we’ve had MANY opportunities to build intimacy throughout our relationship! So don’t be afraid of conflict. In fact, making up can be fantastic!
6. Give Your Partner the “Right” to be “Wrong”
Communication is often the biggest key to relationship success. When you disagree, let your partner know that he/she has every right to think, feel, behave, react, etc. the way they do. Then express your feelings or thoughts about why you don’t agree. Finally, negotiate an agreement with each other of what you will (or won’t) accept. If you can’t reach an agreement, recognize you may be done.
7. Stay As Long As the Love Shall Last
Knowing when to leave a relationship is as valuable as knowing how to stay. If you can’t make and keep agreements or you’re in a relationship that is physically or verbally abusive, get out a.s.a.p.! Traditional wedding vows have couples staying “until death do us part.”
At our wedding ceremony, I said, “I’ll stay as long as the love shall last.” (The justice marrying us almost dropped his book!) What I meant was, I’ll stay until the death of our relationship. Whether it’s physical death or the death of our love. I will stay as long as there’s “energy” on our relationship. If it turns to apathy and empathy, time to go.
