To Risk or Not to Risk?

This is a BIG question.

Should I enter this relationship? Should I marry this man? Should I take a new job? Should I move to a different city?

What if I fail? What if I look stupid? What if I loose money? What if I can’t survive? (If you’re asking this question, it’s probably best NOT to take the risk!)

One of the biggest risks I ever took was marrying Lorenzo. I’d already had ONE failed marriage. What if I had another one? What if he were using me as an entrance fee into the US of A?

All these doubts. All these questions.

So was getting married worth the risk?

Yes.

So far.

Being in a romantic relationship with Lorenzo has taken me to much deeper levels of myself. To my greatest joys and my deepest fears.

And it’s definitely been worth it.

So how do you determine whether to risk or not to risk?

1. To “Ben Franklin?” Or “Dip-Stick?”

My father always said, “If you have a decision to make, do like Ben Franklin … draw a line down the center of the page. On one side list all the advantages. On the other side list the disadvantages. Then see what you’ve got.”

“Ben Franklin” is a Masculine approach to decision making. The Masculine thinks about the risk and the consequences of the choice then makes a logical, intelligent decision.

The Feminine approach is to “Dip-Stick.”

When I was deciding whether or not to marry Lorenzo, Dr. Pat Allen suggested I “dip-stick” my feelings.

If I felt like being married to Lorenzo, I’d put a mark under “Yes.” If I didn’t, I’d mark “No.”

After a week (or two) the “Yes” side won. So we got married. (I bet you thought there was more to it. Non?)

So ladies, draw a line down the page and instead of “advantages” and “disadvantages,” write YES or NO. Then check in with your feelings several times a day for a week or so.

Even if both sides start out equally, one side will eventually win over the other. And the “crazy making” rumination between your head and heart (think, feel, think, feel, think, feel …) will stop.