A Man’s Take on Advice in Women’s Magazines

“Why won’t he commit?”

“Get your man to say ‘I do!’”

“Why don’t guys call when they say they will?”

Peruse any magazine rack and various Web sites and you’ll see headlines such as these splattered all over. Inside you’ll read article upon article about how women can decode, seduce, corral, turn on, and coerce men.

One is left to believe that men don’t want to be married or in any sort of committed relationship, men don’t want to treat women well, men don’t want families, men don’t want to settle down, and worst of all, men don’t even have the desire or the ability to communicate any of this about themselves. Good thing we smell so good.

As a man, I’m starting to feel gosh … a little … frustrated … angry … defensive.

I don’t see much out there to counter these sorts of articles, perhaps because men’s magazines are outnumbered by women’s magazines by about fifty to one (my unofficial estimate).

So please allow me to defend my gender so I can put some different lines in your head.

See, I happen to know men who are actually nice, intelligent, and kind—men who want families, treat women well, and are ready to settle down. I’ll leave their information for you at the bottom of the page. (Now, you’ll read on!) 

Ah, ha. But my last parenthetical statement is just as false of an assumption about women as all the negative media rhetoric is about men. 

I happen to know women who don’t want to be married and/or in a serious relationship. I know women who aren’t the articulate, clear communicators they’re supposed to be. I know women who aren’t that into kids and don’t want a family. 

So pardon my frustration, and other men’s, when we read articles portraying us as the incapable, the insincere, and the incompetent gender.