The Game of Love

By: Glynis B (View Profile)

Am I the only one who believes that you should not say “I love you” unless you truly mean it? Are those only words and just a tool some people use to get what they want or because they sound good? There is “lust” at first sight and people can feel an instant connection, but love is a mature emotion that grows in time. Loving someone is being there for them during the worst of times, as well as the best of times. When something gets a little complicated or difficult, that’s when a loving and sincere person is there. 

My friend has felt terribly down lately. I believe one thing that has triggered all these emotions is a recent death of a teenage boy in her community. After a candlelight vigil, she has had a flood of emotions. She is grieving for so many reasons.  She also feels alone and betrayed. I have tried to console her, telling her not to waste any emotions on this guy. I know it’s easier said than done. At some point in time, we all have been “dumped.” It is not pleasant, it is painful, and it takes time to heal. Thank goodness she has the support of her daughters and close friends.  

As we get older, we also find it is so hard to find someone we are compatible with. People have agendas, are more set in their ways, and have more issues going on in their life. People want perfection, which does not exist. People are not perfect, but there are people that are perfect for one another. 

I have told my friend not to give up on love, that there is someone out there for everyone. I met and married my husband, the love of my life. To get to this happy place in my life, it took some trials and tribulations in the dating world, as well as a divorce. 

Not only do I wish my friend a long and happy life filled with love, I wish her peace. In fact, I wish that for all women. We are all talented, creative, wonderful people in so many ways and we all deserve to be with someone that celebrates and appreciates all these wonderful qualities that we all possess.  

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posted: 07.17.2008
Charles Donahue
I share your conclusion but I have difficulty with your opening comments. Although I accept obvious gender differences, I don't share the belief that either gender has a lock on emotional maturity with respect to romance. Your friend shared with you her perspective on the relationship's demise; the other half has his untold story. I''m sure they're both wonderful people, and the degree that either determines a loving relationship to be a priority, is what will determine whether each will have someone to celebrate their lives with.
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