Julie’s advice to others dealing with pressure from family about wedding venues was this: “It’s helpful to be able to explain why you want to have the wedding where you do, but you don’t have to justify it to your aunt, your coworker, and your mailman.” It’s important to set boundaries early on about your vision for the wedding. Explain what led you to choose your location and why it’s important to you. Then stand your ground. Ask for suggestions on how you can make that location more comfortable for more traditional guests, but don’t ever feel that you have to bow to others’ expectations. It’s okay to say, “This is where we’re getting married. We want you there, and we’ll do what we can to make you happy there, but this is where it’s happening.”
In thinking about locations, be sure to do your research and think of venues beyond those that advertise themselves as “perfect for nuptials.” You’ll quickly learn that anything that has the word “wedding” attached to it costs twice as much—and that includes more traditional wedding venues like ballrooms, hotels, and private estates. Researching and brainstorming venues can be grueling work, but the payoff is worth it.
Susan Beal recounted, “Finding the venue was kind of a pain. I looked at gardens, parks, restaurants, ballrooms, and everything in between for months—most of which were way, way out of our price range. Then I thought of a museum I absolutely love in Portland, the Contemporary Crafts Museum, which is a gorgeous, wood-and-glass 1930s arts center. It’s a very creative, open building with a very relaxed, modern vibe, and I could imagine how fun it would be to celebrate there. It was so much nicer than several of the places I saw charging four times as much, and so much more us.”
You don’t need to limit yourself to private property. Matthew Baldwin was married at the Seattle Aquarium. He explained that “during the planning process, we discovered that a lot of places that seem ‘exotic,’ like the aquarium, are actually a bargain because they are considered city or state parks and therefore rent for cheaper than a corresponding hall. We loved getting married there—the best part was that whenever we had a ‘transition’ (such as from wedding to reception or whatever), there were otters to look at for the guests.” Matthew went so far as to say, “We went to a traditional church wedding about a month after our aquarium wedding, and all we could think was, Booooring.” Matthew has a point: When was the last time you saw otters at a church wedding?
