Do Men Really Cheat? (Part 1)

I decided to write this essay on the subject of men cheating in defense of men. I’m not taking the side of the men because I am a man. I honestly hope to shed new light on male prowess sexual behavior; a subject that was born the day men and women fell in love. In my writings and in my one on one consultation, I don’t pretend to wear rose colored glasses. I call the way I see it. If you are looking to hear what you want to hear as opposed to what you need to hear, this essay is not for you.

This essay is based on generalities; generalities exist for a reason. Generally speaking people fit into categories. I acknowledge that there are exceptions to the rule. And yes, there are women who are unfaithful, but generally speaking, when the topic of “cheating” is under discussion—we are referring to men. Women who do “cheat” are generally looking for an emotional connection rather than a physical one. They prefer a single partner versus having multiple sex partners. By contrast, generally speaking, men are looking for a physical connection and would feel comfortable with more than one sexual partner if that were an option.

For years I’ve listened to society, the media outlets, and women describe male non- monogamous behavior as “cheating.” At the core of men’s sexual need there is something about calling men “cheaters” that just never rang true to me. It just didn’t make sense to me that if men have a very strong biological urge to desire as many women why is that bad? I questioned—do men really “cheat” as defined by our society or are men behaving as men do? Are women overreacting? Is the concept of “cheating” exaggerated and exploited by the media as a ploy to get television ratings, as seen on such shows as Entertainment Tonight, The Insider, the Maury, Dr. Phil, and Oprah? Or are men’s indiscretions used to sell magazines and newspapers such as the classics the National Inquirer, the New York Post, People, and Star: even online gossip driven web sites like PerezHilton.com or TMZ.com exploit “cheaters” for a bigger piece of the internet audience.